Relationship effectiveness
The DBT skill to improve a relationship
GIVE
The DBT skill to get what you want effectively
DEARMAN
The DBT skill to improve self respect
FAST
Name two factors that get in the way of interpersonal effectiveness
You don't have the skills you need, you don't know what you want, emotions, forgetting long term goals for short term, other people, thoughts and beliefs
Emotional, wise, and rational
No attacking, no threats, no judging, no disrespect is part of which GIVE skill
G. Be Gentle
Which of the DEARMAN skills is the following phrase?
"You told me you would be home by dinner but you didn't get here until 11"
Describe
Avoiding selling out your values or integrity to get your objective or to keep a person liking you, is which part of the self respect skill?
Stick to Values
Which of the following is not practicing dialectics
1. Make the best of bad situation
2. treating someone how they treated you
3. Playing devils advocate
2. treating someone how they treated you
needs vs wants....
Communicating to another person that their feelings, thoughts, and actions are understandable to you.
Validate
Which part of DEARMAN is this phrase...
"I would really like it if you would call me when you are going to be late"
Assert
Name two things you do not have to apologize for
Being alive, having an opinion, making a reasonable, request, or disagreeing
What is a definition of dialectics
The art of holding two opposing forces in balance, looking from all points of view, trying to find the truth in situations.
What state of mind do you need to be in to end a relationship
Wise mind
Which of the following is an example of relationship effectiveness:
1. Getting your opinion taken seriously
2. Acting in a way that makes the other person actually want to give you what you are asking for
3. Defending a friend
2. Acting in a way that makes the other person actually want to give you what you are asking for
Which of the following is an example of objective effectiveness:
1. Getting your opinion taken seriously
2. Balancing immediate goals with the good of the long term relationship,
3. Defending a friend
1. Getting your opinion taken seriously
Which of the following is an example of self respect effectiveness:
1. Resolving interpersonal conflict
2. Balancing immediate goals with the good of the long term relationship,
3. Standing up for yourself
3. Standing up for yourself
What is the only constant and guarantee in this world?
Change. And that change will happen
Name two ways to practice mindfulness
Meditation, prayer, practice, movement, yoga, intentionally focusing the mind
Apply the relationship effectiveness skill to this situation:
Carla's best friend wants to come over and discuss a problem; Carla wants to go to bed
Carla could....
Apply the objective effectiveness skill to this situation:
Diego's landlord keeps his damage deposit unfairly and he wants it back
Diego could say...
Apply self respect skill to this situation:
Jims younger sister asks him to cover for her and tell their parents she spent the night at Jims place, which is a lie
Jim could say/do...
Explain the statement: Make lemonade out of lemons
Taking something that seems apparently problematic and turning it into a positive. Finding the silver lining
Name three of the four options you have in any given situation
Solve the problem, Change your emotional response, Accept it, stay miserable