Dad Jokes 1
Why don't scientist trust atoms?
B/c they make up everything!
What do you call fake spaghetti?
an impasta!
Why do bees have sticky hair?
b/c they use honeycombs
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together
How do robots pay for things?
with cache
How do trees access the internet?
They log in!
My wife asked me to stop singing 'Wonderwall' at dinner.
I said maybe
What did the lettuce say to the celery at dinner?
Why did the chicken join a band?
B/c it had the drumsticks!
Why don't programmers like nature?
it has too many bugs
Where do rainbows go when they've been bad?
To prism, so they have time to reflect on what they've done.
My daughter finally started looking for a job. I told her there's an entry level job that people are dying to get into and you start with 3000 people beneath you.
Working at the graveyard isn't for everyone though!
Why is basketball such a messy sport?
Because it's all about dribbling!
Why don't elephants use computers?
Because they're afraid of the mouse!
Why don't computers like spice foods?
too much byte
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
What did the lunch box say to the refrigerator?
Don't hate me because I'm a little cooler.
How do you make Budweiser?
Send him to school.
Why did the Rolling Stones stop making music?
Because they got to bottom of the hill.
What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around?
Dead siri-ous
What's the hardest tea to swallow?
Reality
What did the cow say to the leather chair?
"Hi, Mom!"
Why did the social media manager break up with her boyfriend?
Lack of engagement
Two windmills were sitting on a hill. One asks the other, "Do you have a favorite song?" The other replies,......
"Well... all my life I have been a heavy metal fan."
Why do programmers prefer coding in dark mode?
B/c the light attracts bugs