Restaurant Gigs
This “meal" is what musicians get, if they get it at all, at a high end restaurant during a gig.
What are Bandwiches?
First class airfare, a limo and a suite at the St. Regis.
What is something I don’t get but my manager does?
This piece of paper, stained in beer and trombone slide spit is used to list the musicians and their horrible songs they intend to play.
What is the sign up list?
This event is hosted by a house band that leaves after the 1st set and is never seen again.
What is a Jam Session?
This avoidable sound pierces your eardrums and is present at all sounds checks.
What is feedback?
What is the Restaurant Bar?
Oh yeah man, let me work on it.
What is an empty promise or response from my manager?
This person works at a bank or drives Uber during the week but shows up to jam sessions and expects to be taken seriously.
What is a singer?
Also excepted: What is a Trombone player?
There are no women here.
What is a jazz gig?
This sought after expensive closely guarded item is used by sound people and stage crew to keep mic lines safely adhered to the stage floor… it is also used to mute drum heads, fix music stands and keep keyboard pedals from slipping away.
What is Gaff Tape?
Typically 30 to 60 days after you play this crappy $100 gig.
What is when you will get paid?
A non-refundable deposit, show advance, guest list, and payment info.
What are things that my manager forgot to put in the contract?
College Jazz Students play this song exclusively.
What is Alone Together?
Also excepted: What is this Thing Called Love, Giant Steps or Invitation?
A cut of the door.
What is the only deal the club owner would give you because you are still building a following even though you’re 44 years old and have been playing for 30 years.
This activity goes on much longer then it should and ultimately never results in a positive experience at show time.
What is sound check?
Piano Man, The Charlie Brown Song, or Don’t Know Why.
What are the only songs people request?
20-30%
Someone not allowed to mess with the drum set configuration.
Who is a left handed drummer?
Book the gig, promote the show, rehearse the music, hire top talent, travel at your own expense, and play 4 sets.
What a club owner expects you to do for $400?
A stage plot with input list clearly specified.
This is the volume to play when at your restaurant gig.
What is very quietly?
Something your manager expects you to have before they will sign you.
What is an agent?
This is a classic song that should be avoided at all costs especially with a “back beat groove”.
What is My Funny Valentine?
The dream of all college jazz music students.
What is to move to New York City and play jazz gigs all the time?
The cause for buzzing on all instruments using a DI that should be preset yet must be mentioned by the musician to get the sound guy to do it.
What is the ground lift?