Resolving Conflict
What is a problem?
Problems are when something isn’t going the way that we want.
How might you feel when you make a mistake?
Embarrassed, sad, angry, frustrated, confused, disappointed
True or False: I ALWAYS need to apologize
False: There are situations where we do not have to apologize. For example, we don't have to apologize when we say "no thank you" when someone asks if we want something.
How do problems begin?
People want different things, people have different opinions, miscommunication, feelings are hurt, someone is unkind, mistakes are made
True or False: When someone says you made a mistake, they are always correct
False! Remember everyone makes mistakes. So there is a chance that you might actually be right and the other person is wrong.
When are times we have to apologize?
We may need to apologize when we:
Hurt someone physically or emotionally
Make a mistake that affects someone else
Make a hurtful choice
Break someone's trust
Stops little deals from turning into big deals, Helps you understand how someone else feels and thinks , Helps you build problem solving skills, Teaches you to stop and think before reacting, Helps you build strong friendships and relationships
Why should we stop before we say or do anything after we make a mistake?
It helps you from saying or doing something mean and making the problem bigger
What makes a "bad" apology?
Blaming, minimizing (It's not a big deal), apologizing for their reaction (Sorry you got mad at me), Not changing your action (You keep doing the same thing over and over again).
What are the 5 steps of fixing a problem
(1) STOP, (2) Think, (3) Express, (4) Listen, (5) Solve the problem/conflict
What can you say after you made a mistake?
You're right, I am wrong. I didn't know that. I misunderstood what you meant. I made a mistake. I see what I did wrong. I shouldn't have done that.
What are the 4 parts of an apology?
(1) Saying I am sorry, (2) Say what you did, (3), Take responsibility, (4) Try to make it better.
Ms. Joi wanted to play Uno, but Ms. Holly wanted to play Jenga. How can they solve this problem?
They can make a deal to play one game first and then the other. Play rock paper scissors to decide what game to play. Pick another game both of them want to play.
What should you NOT do after you make a mistake?
Blame someone else, argue, make excuses, Say "I don't care!", Be mean to the other person, Bring up something the other person did wrong
Your friend told you that she wants to try out for choir. You tell her "I don't think you should. You're not a good singer." Your friend started crying. Following the 4 steps of how to apologize, how should you apologize?
"I am sorry I said you were not a good singer. That was not nice to say. I will support whatever you want to do."