Entering social exchange
Joenaiya notices her parents talking in a low tone about something serious, like finances or family problems. She wants to ask them a question.
Joenaiya realizes it’s inappropriate to interrupt and decides to wait until they’re finished or until the conversation seems lighter.
Joenaiya’s younger sibling is upset because they lost a favorite toy.
“I know it’s really hard to lose something special. Let’s look for it together. I’m here to help.”
Joenaiya is working on a school project, but her older sibling wants to use the computer or table at the same time.
calmly but confidently explain that she needs the space to finish her work before her sibling can take over.
Angry
Deep breathes and counting to 10
Joenaiya sees two classmates whispering to each other during recess, and she feels curious.
Joenaiya understands that it might be a private conversation and decides not to join in, recognizing that it’s inappropriate to intrude.
A classmate didn’t do well on a test and feels bad. Joenaiya notices and says,
“I’m sorry the test was tough for you. I know you tried your best. Do you want to study together for the next one?”
In a group project, one of Joenaiya’s classmates tries to take all the credit for the work she did.
Joenaiya stands up for herself by politely correcting the teacher or the classmate, making sure her contributions are recognized.
Frustrated
Stepping away from the task or asking for help
A kid Joenaiya doesn’t know well is sitting alone on the swings, looking sad. Joenaiya wonders if she should approach them.
Joenaiya feels it’s appropriate to ask if the person wants to talk or play, as they might need a friend.
Two of Joenaiya’s friends are arguing over a game, and one of them is almost in tears. Joenaiya steps in and says,
“I can see that both of you really care about this game. Maybe we can take turns or find a new way to play together so everyone feels happy.”
Joenaiya’s friends are trying to convince her to do something she’s not comfortable with, like sneaking out or teasing another kid.
Joenaiya firmly says no, explaining that it’s not right, even if it means upsetting her friends.
Sad
asking for a moment alone
Joenaiya is at a store with her family and hears two strangers arguing loudly over something.
Joenaiya realizes it’s inappropriate to get involved in other people’s disagreements, so she stays near her family and doesn’t try to intervene.
Joenaiya’s teacher is visibly stressed because the class is being noisy and not following directions. Joenaiya quietly approaches the teacher and says,
“It seems like you’re having a tough day. Maybe we can help by getting everyone to settle down. I’ll try to remind my friends to listen.”
During cheer practice, the coach is only giving playing time to the more skilled players.
Joenaiya stands up for herself by asking the coach for a fair chance to participate and show her effort.
Tired
Asking for a 10-15 min break
Joenaiya needs help with her homework, but her teacher is busy assisting another student with a difficult problem.
Joenaiya decides it’s inappropriate to interrupt, so she waits until the teacher is free or asks if she can help the other student while she waits.
Joenaiya’s cousin is feeling left out because they’re shy and don’t know how to join the group activities. Joenaiya says,
“I understand it can be hard to jump in. Let’s go together and start a game so you don’t feel left out. I’m here with you.”
At home, Joenaiya notices that she is the only one who takes the trash out in her room that she shares with her sister.
Joenaiya could tell her mom calmly that she has taken out the trash the last few times and that it is unfair.
Shy
Give herself some space from others and go back when she is ready or she can leave the situation if it is too much