Jobs in the Lab
You can become this in as little as 6-8 weeks
Phlebotomist
Sputum isn't ______
spit or saliva
Just call me pregnant
HCG
Urine
Good Cholesterol
HDL
2 year or 4 year degree
Medical Lab Technologist (MLT)
These help push sputum out of the mouth by coughing
cilia
Hypokalemia
Low Potassium
Pick a finger...any finger...
capillary
capillary blood sample
Hypernatremia
High Sodium
May take up to 11 years of school
Pathologist
Pink or Pink Frothy Sputum
Cause baby you're a heaaarrrrt attaccck...come on show em allllll your plaque....
LDL
Better bring some sweet smelling spray....cause...man...today most definitely ain't your day
stool
Elevated with infection (use my REAL name)
Leukocyte Count
Reads tests that are cell specific
Cytotechnologist
This color sputum may indicate a pulmonary embolism
Red
glucose
I might throw hands...or arms...or feet......but you and my arteries won't ever meet
Venous
Venous Blood Sample
I can perform your biopsy
Pathologist
I can help a Pathologist diagnose disease from tissue samples
Histotechnologist
Common sign of black lung disease
Brown sputum
I know I be looking like a whole side of muscular beef....but you got my kidneys cryin for relief...
Creatinine
Cath Urine
Catheter collected urine
Blue lips means my oxygen and this lab value has dipped...
Hemoglobin