I'm Kind of a Big Deal
You are 3rd in line to go down for lunch when Lauren budges in front of you. How big is your problem? How can you try to fix it?
This is a very small problem. You can let it go because you are all going to get to lunch or you can use an i-message.
Javier keeps stepping on your heels in line and laughing.
What i-message can you use?
I feel frustrated when you keep stepping on my heels, can you please give me some space?
You have a spelling test coming up. How can you best prepare for it (name 3 ways)?
Notecards, writing each word several times, write them in alphabetical order, have someone quiz you, write the words into a story, write the words on a cold window
Your teacher is giving a math lesson. She asks what 3x7 equals and you know the answer. You shoot your hand up as well as other classmates. She calls on Jim Bob who answers 28. Do you
A) Shout out "it's 21!" B) Raise your hand
C) Whisper "21" D) Say "Good try Jim Bob!"
B- raise your hand quietly
Although you may have wanted to praise Jim Bob for a good try, it is not your turn to talk unless called on
You are so annoying, please stop!
Is this a helpful statement or not? Explain and provide an alternative if needed.
YOU messages are NOT helpful! They make the person feel defensive. Telling someone they are annoying is not specific- no one can change their behavior if they do not know it's a problem.
Ex. I feel frustrated because I am trying to focus and you are making a lot of noise. Can you please work quietly.
You are playing Mat Ball in gym class and running the bases! The pitcher throws the ball and you think you've cleared it but everyone is saying you're out. You feel angry and frustrated because you really don't think it hit you.
How big is your problem? What can you do?
This is a very small problem. Although you feel mad, it is just a game. If you have told everyone you did not get hit but others say you did, you just have to let it go and continue enjoying the game. It is okay to take a break to cooldown if needed.
You are in a group chat with Adison and Nika. At school you find out they started a separate chat without you to make fun of your brother.
What i-message can you use?
I feel sad and disappointed when you talk about my brother like that, can you please keep those thoughts to yourself?
You are struggling to stay focused in class. Name 2 strategies to help you find your focus.
Eliminate other distractions, move to a quiet area if possible, ask to take a bathroom or water break (cold water on face), do some deep breathing
When feeling antsy in class, I can do which of the following? Select more than (1)
- Tip back and forth in my chair
- Ask to use the bathroom
- Play with an approved fidget
- Poke at my neighbor
-Repeatedly squeeze and relax my muscles or fists
- Ask to use the bathroom
- Play with an approved fidget
-Repeatedly squeeze and relax my muscles or fists
You cheated! You always cheat, I see you do that like every time during gym and recess.
Is this helpful and appropriate? What can we do or say instead if needed?
How big is your problem and what can you do?
This is a moderately big problem. If someone is continuing to pick on you day after day even after you have asked them to stop, this is not okay. It is time to ask an adult for help. It is important to tell that adult that this is an ongoing issue.
You get your math test back in class and Landon sees you got 12/20. He says "What? How did you only get 12/20? That test was so easy!"
What i-message can you use?
I feel sad and embarrassed when you call me out for my score, can you please keep your comments to yourself?
Name 2 ways you can make sure you have all of your stuff to go home and come back to school.
-checklist
-sign on door/locker
-check planner and make sure you have everything you need
-double check, triple check, quadruple check!
Your teacher is giving instructions for an assignment. Once she is finished talking, she asks if anyone has any questions. You raise your hand and ask if she heard from your mom as to whether you are taking the bus or going to car line.
Is this appropriate or not appropriate?
This is not appropriate. As a general rule, if the answer to the question only pertains to you, it is better to ask your teacher individually. In this case, it also shows you were not focused on the instructions but your pickup plans.
If you get me a bunch of Robux for my birthday, I will be your best friend and give you the biggest piece of cake.
Is this appropriate? Why or why not?
Not appropriate. Although this is not an unkind thing to say to someone, it is not okay. Best friends are not decided by who spends the most on you, creates stress on that person to spend money they may not have, may make others feel upset they can not do that for you, displays lack of gratitude and friendship contingent on material items or gifts, bribery, etc.
It's lunchtime and you realized you forgot your cold lunch at home. You hate chicken drummies and that is what is being served for hot lunch!
What size is your problem and what can you do?
This is a small problem. You can tell the lunchroom supervisor or Mrs. Caron and they will make sure you get something to eat. You may end up with chicken drummies but take a deep breath, eat what you can, it's just 1 meal!
You were feeling really stressed out about your upcoming science project. Jessa went above and beyond to help you figure out your topic and help you design your presentation board.
What i-Message can you use?
I feel so grateful and relieved from all of the help you gave me for the project. Can we plan to get together soon to hang out?
When reading a print out for class, what is 1 strategy for remembering key concepts?
highlighting or underlining the important parts, take notes
Your teacher is giving you feedback on your writing assignment. You become frustrated because you disagree with her and believe you did what she asked.
What can you do?
Step away if you can, take a breath, think again about what she said and review your writing. If you are still feeling the same way, you can say "Mrs. Warmka/Verber, I am feeling very frustrated because I still do not understand what I need to do. Can you explain it again?"
Talking to a friend at recess- "Let's not talk to Rachel at all today. I know we aren't mad at her but it will be funny. She won't know what's going on."
Appropriate or not? Why?
Doing something to another person or ignoring another person whether it is a prank or not is hurtful. How would you feel?
You and Sam have plans to play sandman at recess. When you get out there, Sam is playing football with a couple other students. You confront Sam and give him an i-message. Sam invites you to join them for football. You are mad because Sam promised to play sandman and you don't want to play football so now you are alone.
How big is your problem? What can you do?
This is a very small problem. This does not mean Sam does not want to play with you; plans just changed. You let him know how you feel so now you can find another friend to play a different game with.
Sia keeps putting her foot out to trip you and shoving you when you're on the stairs. You even fell down 3 stairs last week! You have asked her to stop before but she didn't.
What i-message can you use?
We are past i-Messages. This is dangerous and bullying. You need to tell an adult at this point.
What are some time-management strategies?
-Set a timer and give yourself breaks
-Don't procrastinate
-Break the assignment into parts
-Write out your to-do list and estimate how much time for each item
Your teacher is 15 minutes into her science lesson when you remember you forgot to turn in an assignment to the turn in bin. What do you do?
Wait until she is done teaching and there is a movement time to turn it in so you do not disrupt the class.
You are talking to your friend Juan "You and I are pretty good friends, like we have gotten closer but we're not best friends. Like sometimes you talk about your dog too much sooo..."
Appropriate or not appropriate?
We do not put our friends on a scale. You may have a best friend but it is really just for you to know. Others may feel hurt because they see you as their best friend. Also, telling them something they are doing that annoys you in that way is unkind.