3 Questions
List the three questions
Is it safe?, Is it respectful?, Will I feel proud of this later?
What are you supposed to do under stop?
Pause and take some time
What two questions do you have under friendship test?
Would I want my friend to make this choice?
Would I give this advice to a friend?
Using three questions check.
You want to post a joke about a friend online.
Is it safe?
Is it respectful?
Will I feel proud of this later?
Should I do this? Why?
Is it safe? Yes, no one will get physically hurt
Is it respectful? No jokes at other people's expense are not respectful.
Will I feel proud of this later? No
Should I do this? Why? No because it's mean to make fun of other people and could hurt them emotionally.
What is the final question you could ask yourself? (Hint: Not one of the "3 Questions")
Should I do this and why?
It can be different depending on the situation and the person. It could be three seconds or an evening.
What is the goal of the friendship test?
To help you make good decisions.
Using Stop Think Choose answer this scenario.
A classmate shows you their art project.You are trying to decide what you should say.
Stop: Take a moment to pause
Think: Should I say something nice, ignore it/change the subject, or say something not nice
Choose: Say something nice
What does it mean for something to be safe? (Hint: we are just talking about three questions check, is it safe?)
Is it a physically safe thing, will someone get hurt.
What questions do you ask under values check?
Does this decision support the kind of person I want to be?
Does this support my goals in life?
A student in the hallway trips and drops all the papers they were carrying. You think about helping them pick them up and making sure they are ok.
Is it safe? Yes, it is safe to help them.
Is it respectful? Of course it is nice to help someone you would want them to do it for you.
Will I feel proud of this later? You should since it is helpful and nice
Should I do this? Why? Yes, because you are helping someone who may be hurt and needs it.
Solve this scenario with the three questions check.
I want to tell my friend they are stupid, because we always joke about this kind of thing.
Is it safe? Yes physically so
Is it respectful? No, that could hurt their feelings name calling is still not nice
Will I feel proud of this later? Likely not especially when I'm older.
I shouldn't do it.
What do you do under choose?
Choose the most responsible and safest option.
What is one of your core values?
Using Friendship Test answer the following scenario.
You are thinking about not eating today or tomorrow because you feel you need to lose weight. You are plenty healthy otherwise.
Would I want my friend to make this decision? No, they should eat.
Would I give this advice to a friend? No. Especially if they are healthy they should eat but they should eat if if they are overweight.
Solve this scenario with the three questions check.
I see a kid on my team getting targeted in a game in PE because they are not the most athletic. They look pretty frustrated and sad. I jump in and try to help get others out of the game.
Is it safe? As long as you aren't playing the game too roughly others shouldn't get hurt.
Is it respectful? Yes, you are being nice to that kid.
Will I feel proud later: Likely, because you helped the non-athletic kid they will be less frustrated and you might win.
I want to eat another bowl of ice cream, after I've already had dinner and one large bowl of ice cream.
Stop: Take a few minutes to decide (pause)
Think: I should eat this ice cream. I should not eat this ice cream.
Choose: I should not eat this ice cream.
Using Values Check answer the following scenario.
I hear a bunch of people making fun of someone because of the shirt they are wearing. I jump in and do it too.
Does this decision support the kind of person I want to be? No, I don't want to be mean to people.
Does this support my goals in life? Being rude to people because of their clothing does not help get me further and could cause me problems in the future.
Using Values Check answer the following scenario.
Your friend wants you to lie and say they were in the office for part of class but they were really hanging out in the bathroom.
Does this decision support the kind of person I want to be? Likely not no one wants to be a known liar
Does this support my goals in life? No lying may solve problems in the short term but it will not help with larger term goals.