CHORES
“I’ll do my chore later”
Answer with an open ended question
Bonus Points: How can you follow up with this youth later in the day?
Open Ended Question: “Can you share what will be different later?”
Follow Up: “ You shared that you have more energy in the afternoon, how are you doing now?"
“My roommate stinks”
Answer with an open ended question.
For Bonus Points: Affirmation
Open Ended Question “Can you tell me more?”
Bonus Points: “It shows that you care that you’re bringing this to staff’s attention.”
“I never smoke weed with someone I don’t know”
Answer with a reflection.
Reflection: “You prioritize your safety as more important than getting high.”
“I don’t need therapy”
Answer with a reflection.
Reflection: “You’re not interested in talking with a therapist or social worker.”
“I don’t have time right now to do my chore, I’m heading out.”
Answer with a reflection.
Bonus Points: How can we hold this youth accountable?
Reflection: “You’re being pulled in a few different directions.”
Bonus Points: “How do you keep track of your responsibilities when you’re being pulled in different directions?”
“You’ve got to tell them that they stink.”
Answer with a reflection.
Bonus Points: What should we assess for?
Reflection “I hear that this is urgent, and you’re looking to solve this right away.”
Bonus Points: Depression, Baseline shift (psychosis), Bullying
“I know we aren’t supposed to come back drunk, but I’m not an alcoholic.”
Answer with a reflection.
Reflection “On one hand, you don’t see your drinking as excessive. On the other hand, you recognize that you have broken community values.”
“I don’t have depression, that’s for people way worse off than me.”
Answer with an open ended question.
Open Ended Question: “Can you tell me what you know about depression?”
“I already cleaned my room, why should I clean up after other people?”
Answer with an affirmation or reflection (Bonus Points for both).
Affirmation: “You’re really on top of your responsibilities to keep your bedroom in order”
Reflection: “You’re really fed up with some aspects of community living”
“I told them, you’ve got to shower. You stink. Somebody had to tell them.”
Answer with an affirmation or reflection (Bonus Points for both).
For DOUBLE Bonus Points, how can we address this youth's communication skills?
Affirmation: "You were trying to look out for them."
Reflection: "It sounds like if the roles were reversed, you’d appreciate honesty from your friends.”
Additional Bonus Points:
“You really appreciate honesty, have you ever met someone who reacted poorly when you were honest? What might be some reasons they reacted differently than you would have?”
“Usually I just smoke with my friends, but lately I’ve been smoking alone a lot more”
Answer with an open ended question.
Open Ended Question “What do you think has changed?”
“Medication doesn’t help me.”
Answer with an open ended question.
Open Ended Question: “What is helpful?”
“We have a facilities team, why do I have to do chores?”
Answer with an affirmation or reflection (Bonus Points for both).
Reflection: “Our chore system doesn't make sense to you.”
Affirmation: “I can see that it’s easy for you to speak your mind.”
“I don’t know why everyone’s on me about showering.”
Answer with an open ended question.
Bonus Points: What do we think is going on with this youth? Why could they make a statement like this?
Open Ended Question “What do you think the problem is?”
Bonus Points: Mental Health or youth may be embarrassed
“I thought red wine was supposed to be good for your heart. That’s why I drink it every night”
Answer with a reflection.
Reflection: “Your health is important to you, and you’re invested in learning about ways to have a healthy body.”
“Talking to a social worker isn’t going to make me feel any better.”
Answer with an open ended question.
Open Ended Question: “What do you usually do to feel better?”
“I shouldn’t have to clean up after grown adults.”
Answer with an affirmation or reflection (Bonus Points for both).
Affirmation: “You stand up for yourself when something doesn’t feel fair.”
Reflection: “It’s hard to feel like you’re pulling other people’s weight.”
“It’s hard to shower some days”
Answer with an open ended question.
Bonus Points: What do we think is going on with this youth? What information is important for us to know?
Open Ended Question “Can you tell me more?”
Bonus Points: We should assess if this is a recent change, as this youth may be struggling with depression.
“I think everyone is blowing this out of proportion. I’m 21, it’s normal for me to be drinking.”
Answer with a reflection.
Reflection: “You don’t feel understood.”
“I was suicidal in high school, that was in the past. I’m much better now.”
Answer with an open ended question.
Open Ended Question: "Can you tell me about what changed? When did things change?"
We should also ask about the last time they had suicidal thoughts.