Emails
This 3-letter acronym is placed in an email subject line when you want a coworker to read the information but absolutely do not expect a reply.
What is FYI?
Microwaving this specific category of food in the office breakroom is universally considered a punishable offense by your coworkers.
What is fish / seafood?
When a manager says they want to resume a discussion or return to an idea
What is circle back?
These comfortable pants are the undisputed king of the "WFH dress code," silently worn just out of frame of the laptop camera.
What are sweatpants/pajama pants?
These small, colourful, square pieces of paper are stuck to monitors, desks, and keyboards to remind us of tasks we will probably still forget.
What are sticky notes / Post-its?
This passive-aggressive phrase is the corporate equivalent of saying, "Can you read?" or "I already answered this."
What is "Per my last email"?
This is the unwritten "golden rule" of the office coffee pot: if you drink the last cup, you must do this.
What is brew a new pot?
If a colleague wants to discuss something privately or stop talking about it in a meeting, they asks you to politely do this.
What is let's take this offline?
By far the most commonly uttered phrase of the 2020s, usually shouted at someone who is enthusiastically talking to a silent screen.
What is you're on mute?
What is worn to communicate the universal, unspoken office sign for "I am busy, please do not talk to me."
What are headphones / noise-canceling headphones?
When someone walks up to your desk to ask a "quick question" without emailing or messaging you first, they are performing this unannounced office maneuver.
What is a desk drop / drive-by?
In The Office, Jim famously pranks Dwight by encasing this essential desktop tool in a bowl of yellow Jell-O.
What is a stapler?
This acronym represents the target numbers or metrics used to evaluate how well an individual or department is actually performing.
What are KPIs? / Key Performance Indicators
This virtual meeting feature lets you hide your messy bedroom or pile of laundry behind a fake image of a luxury penthouse or outer space.
What is a virtual background?
This obsolete piece of office machinery, which relies on telephone lines to transmit printed documents, still mysteriously exists in medical and legal offices.
What is a fax machine?
According to multiple workplace productivity studies, this specific day of the week and time is statistically voted the worst possible slot to schedule a meeting.
What is Friday afternoon?
This classic physical fixture of the traditional office has historically been the ultimate destination for gathering to gossip and chat.
What is the water cooler?
This buzzword is just a fancy, corporate way of saying "working together," though it sounds like a sci-fi power source.
What is synergy?
This awkward moment occurs when a presenter shares their entire desktop instead of just the window, accidentally revealing their personal chats or browser tabs.
What is an accidental screen share?
This desk accessory, designed to help ergonomics, is often sat on, kicked under the desk, or used to spin around when you are bored.
What is an office chair? / What is an exercise ball?
This is the term for when a quick, 15-minute "sync" slowly expands to cover completely unrelated topics, stretching the meeting to an hour.
What is scope creep / meeting creep?
This is the sudden, frantic keyboard shortcut maneuver you perform when a manager unexpectedly walks up behind your desk.
What is minimizing the window? / Alt-Tabbing?
This agricultural metaphor refers to picking the easiest, most obvious tasks or quick wins first.
What is low-hanging fruit?
To protect your actual working hours from getting eaten by random meetings, you might use this defensive calendar tactic.
What is calendar blocking / focus time?
This psychological theory (phrase) suggests that employees with highly cluttered desks are either chaotic geniuses or overwhelmed.
What is "a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind"?