Pun-ishment
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
Because they don’t have the guts
What has a face and two hands but cannot hold anything?
a clock
I don’t have a mouth but I always answer when spoken to.
What am I?
an echo
This animal’s milk is naturally pink because of special acids it secretes.
hippopotamus
Which country has no official national language, even though most people assume it does?
the United States
Why don’t programmers like nature?
because it has too many bugs
I break, but I am not a thing. I can be fixed, but not with tools.
What am I?
a heart
People buy me to eat, but never eat me.
What am I?
a plate
This country’s national anthem has no official lyrics—just music.
Spain
Which country has the only non-rectangular national flag in the world?
Nepal
What do you call a factory that only makes acceptable products?
a satisfactory
I have lakes with no water, mountains with no stone, and roads with no pavement.
What am I?
a map
What has 13 hearts, no organs, and no body?
a deck of cards
This planet rains diamonds because of extreme atmospheric pressure.
Neptune
Which planet has a day that is longer than its year?
Venus
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
because he was outstanding in his field
I am always hungry but never eat, and I grow the more you feed me.
What am I?
fire
I am bought by the meter but worn by the foot. What am I?
carpet
This creature has ears on its legs.
grasshoppers
Which fruit can cook your tongue because it contains natural heat-activated enzymes?
pineapple
Why are elevator jokes so good?
because they work on so many levels
The person who made me didn’t want me. The person who bought me didn’t use me.
The person who used me didn’t know.
What am I?
a coffin
I am born when two people meet,
I grow without food,
I live without air,
I die if either person forgets me.
What am I?
a memory
What was the first food ever eaten in space?
apple purée
Which animal can hold a grudge for years and remember human faces?
crows