Tracking
What are the "Do's" of a play therapist? what are we trying to always convey with our clients and what is our role in the room?
Tracking Example-
Child: (Puts the plastic soldiers in a straight line, then begins to build a wall around them.)
Child: (Begins to enact a battle with the plastic soldiers.) Pow, bang, boom.
Child: (Knocks over several of the plastic soldiers then covers them with sand.)
Therapist: You're lining them up and making a wall to protect them.
Therapist: Sounds like they are really fighting.
Therapist: Looks like those got hit and now you are covering them up.
Counselor's tone of Voice matches the energy of the play
Therapist's Tone of Voice and Expression Is Congruent with the Child's Affect
• During the play therapy session, children are developing a greater understanding of their feelings and themselves. When reflecting children's feelings or validating their experience, the therapist's tone of voice needs to mirror children's expressions and experiences.
Example:
The child is quiet and solemn while burying several people in the sand.
Inaccurate Reflection: In a happy or excited voice the therapist states: You know how to bury the people in the sand.
Accurate Reflection: In a solemn tone of voice the therapist states: You are burying them in the sand.
Example:
The child looks angry and is hitting and kicking the bop bag.
Inaccurate Reflection: In a quiet and sad voice the therapist states: Oh, no, you are really letting him have it. (Almost empathizing with Bobo's feelings.)
Accurate Reflection: In an angry voice the therapist states: You're really angry. You're letting him have it.
Why do we give choices?
Choice-giving is an intervention that helps children become aware of their own preferences as well as encouraging their imaginations. When a child holds up a toy bear and asks you, “what’s this?” the adult can fall right into labelling it for the child.
To a grown up, that bear may seem to be just a bear – but in play therapy, the child gets to decide. Maybe your kid wants the bear to be his dad, or big brother, or maybe a bully from school – maybe he wants it to be himself! Your child may not even be consciously aware of the symbolism or significance involved, but nonetheless, she is processing her feelings and experiences by using toys in rich and imaginative ways to represent thoughts and feelings from her real world.
Choice giving can be about the child choosing what to call toys, how to play with them, or how much to imagine. It can mean allowing the child to make messes you would never allow at home! Ex- a pool noodle can be a sword, a pony, a canon, a log, a tree etc…
Limit setting starts day 1:
Who knows the opening greeting with a child the very first time they enter the play room?
The opening greeting sets the tone for the day: “Welcome to your playroom! You can play with any of the toys in many of the ways you like or almost in any way you like.”
What are we not trying to convey and what should we not be doing in the room?
What is Reflecting Content? Why do we do it? what does it sound like?
Reflecting content helps the child know that you hear and understand the content of her message. It also provides the child with the opportunity to hear the message so that she can hear what she has said. This helps validate her perspective and clarify her understanding of self.
Example of missed opportunity:
Child: Tyler looked at the bop bag and then put sand in the plastic cup and said, “I’m going to poison his orange juice and then he will die”
Therapist: “you decided to put sand into the plastic cup”
Commentary: the therapist missed an opportunity to respond to the significance of Tyler’s communication. The content of Tyler’s communication was more significant than the fact that he was putting sand into the cup. Acknowledging non-verbal behavior is an important response to use when a child is not communicating verbally. It lets the child know that you are present and care about him or her.
Corrected response: “you want the poisonous orange juice to kill him”
Esteem Building/Decision Making
This is a well-known goal in working with children because little ones often feel small and insignificant, especially when dealing with big, scary experiences they don’t know how to handle. Esteem building can be as simple as letting a child struggle with opening a container, then celebrating with them with a big enthusiastic “You did it!”.
Draw attention to the child’s effort instead of grading quality. The therapist refrains from saying, “good job!” as the better response for the child will be: “you worked so hard on that! You feel proud!”
Do we label toys in the room?
Nope! Don’t – label toys or objects until the child has. Label toys in the room as such, “ you are grabbing that”, “ you are curious about that one”, “ that one is your favorite”, “ that one is colorful”.
Limit Setting Importance:
Limit setting: is a tremendously effective technique in play therapy. Although kids get a huge degree of freedom in the playroom, the real world has limits. Nowhere else in a child’s daily world can they make so many choices and have such expansive control.
Limit setting is done in a very precise way, always phrased in this specific manner: “You may want to hit me with the toy. This toy is not to be used for hitting.”
This I know you want to…but this is not for that message can be tremendously empowering for a child when delivered calmly in a matter-of-fact tone.
Instead of getting yelled at, often without much warning, for doing something an adult dislikes, the limit setting intervention slows the process down and allows the child to make a clear decision.
Therapists can even extend this by introducing logical consequences. It could work like this: “Timmy, I know you want to throw the toy, but that toy is not for throwing. The moment you choose to throw the toy again is the moment you choose for the toy to be put away for the rest of today.” This is a great example of how limit setting allows a child to learn self-control, emotional regulation, and the ability to experience logical consequences for their behavior.
Why do we Track and what is Tracking?
Refkecting Content Examples:
Child: Hey, who was in here? (Child bends down and is looking into the sandbox and points at footprints in the sand.
Child: Who did it? Let me see the bottom of your shoe
Child: (Begins covering the footprints with the shovel. Joshua puts his hand in the sand and begins to move the sand from one side of the sandbox to the other.) Earthquake!
Child: Batman and Robin are here! ( drops sand on the earthquake.)
Therapist: You noticed that there are footprints in there.
Therapist: You want to see the bottom of my shoe and see if it's like that shoe.
Therapist: Here comes an earthquake.
Therapist: Batman and Robin dropped some things on the earthquake.
Therapist: No matter what they do; it's not enough to stop that earthquake.
Esteem Building examples
Child: (Enters the playroom and looks around the room.) What should I do?
Therapist: In here you can decide what you want to play.
Child: (Walks toward the arts and crafts table and pulls out a piece of paper.) I know what I can do.
Therapist: You figured out what you want to do.
Child: I am gonna make a picture for my mommy.
Therapist: You've got a plan and know just what you want to do.
Child: (Begins to pick out colors from the markers/crayons and starts drawing.) I'm gonna make a rainbow.
Therapist: You know just what you want to do and how to make it.
Child: Yeah . .. what colors should I put in my rainbow?
Therapist: You can decide what colors to use.
Child: I think I'll use blue and red because they are my favorite colors.
Therapist: You figured out a way to decide what colors to use.
Child: Now I'm gonna make some flowers.
Therapist: Decided what you wanted to draw next.
Child: (Begins to draw the flowers.)
Therapist: You are working hard on your picture.
Child: (Brings the picture to the therapist.) All done. I am gonna give this to Mommy.
Therapist: You got it just the way you want it and are excited to give it to
your mommy.
Do we make kids clean up when the session is over?
Don’t- make child clean up anything unless they initiate and desire to clean. If this happens you can state “you are so helpful” or “ you enjoy helping others”. If it becomes a habit for the client to always clean and organize, this could be telling they seek control, and you will need to get creative to help them find other ways to have control.
Examples of setting limits
Tracking Example:
Child: (Pushes a truck across the sandbox.) Vrrmm.
Child: (Scoops the sand and puts it in the back of the truck.)
Child: Pushes the truck back to the other side of the sandbox; dumps out the sand.)
Therapist: You're pushing that right across there.
Therapist: Pouring that right in there.
Therapist: Now back over there and dumping it right there.
Reflection of Feelings
Reflecting feelings communicates understanding and acceptance of children’s feelings and needs. It also shows children that you are interested and that you want to understand them. This process helps children understand, accept, and label their feelings. Children also learn how to verbally communicate their feelings. If a feeling is expressed and goes unrecognized, children may think that the feeling or expression is not accepted.
Recognizing feelings:
You seem frustrated that…..
You look happy….
You’re angry that….
You’re confused….
You look excited…
You are sad.
You really like….
You don’t like….
guidelines for helping a child:
Wait until the child asks for help.
Encourage the child while he or she is working on the task:
For example, a three-year-old child may have difficulty taking off a lid that has been tightly put on a plastic jar. It is appropriate to work together as a team to open the jar lid.
4. If a child:
Then, respond: "Show me what you want done." Or “thank you for asking for help when you needed it”.
• This response encourages the child to make decisions about how the child would like you to help. This approach also helps the child focus on what specifically needs to be done to accomplish the task.
While working on the task together:
• Encourage the child -"You are working hard ..”
Upon completion of the task:
When a child does not know what to do in session
You can have two ideas to present them or you can let the, sit in curiosity and not being sure. Some kids are insistent that you help them choose.
" you really need help choosing today, we could draw or we could play a game?"
Handcuffs-
If a child requests to handcuff you behind your back, you can whisper and say " My hands will go in front of me to be hand cuffed"
Toy Guns/ Nerf Guns
If a child wants to shoot at you
" Im not for shooting in the face"
If a child asks you to shoot them
" I don't want to pretend to shoot you or hurt you, so I will shoot at that toy instead"
Paint- Paint stays in the cup
Sand- Sand stays in the bucket
Slime- Slime is not for the carpet or couch
Glitter- I pour the glitter for you
Tracking Example:
Child: (Gets up and begins looking around the room.)
Child: (Picks up the airplane and drops it in the sandbox, and begins looking for more toys to use in the sandbox.)
Child: (Puts the plastic soldiers in the sandbox and begins to set up a scene using all the toys he has brought over.)
Therapist: You've got all you want for now and you are getting them the way you want them.
Therapist: Looking around for something else.
Therapist: Putting that right there and seeing what else you want to use.
Therapist: You've got all you want for now and you are getting them the way you want them.
Reflecting Feelings Example:
Child: (Picking up a toy from the shelf and turning towards the therapist)
Child: l have one at home and they have one at school
Therapist: You're excited to see some toys you use in other places.
Child: I like to go to school because I get to play with my friend.
Therapist: You like school and have fun with your friend.
Child: (Goes to the chalkboard and begins to draw.) yeah but sometimes we have to read.
Therapist: Sounds like you don't like to have to read at school.
Child: Uh huh. (Still drawing on the board.)
Therapist: You are making something right on there ... you are really concentrating on what you are drawing.
Child: Yeah .... I like to draw at school but I don't get to because the teacher said the board is just for her.
Therapist: Sounds like you feel mad when you don't get to draw on the board at school.
Child: Yeah ... we don't get to play what we want either. We have to do what the teacher says.
Therapist: You feel mad when you don't get to play at school.
Child: (Begins to play in the sandbox.) I like this too.
Therapist: You found something else you enjoy.
Child: Yeah . . but when Mommy takes me to the park I can't play in the sand because I might get dirty.
Therapist: You feel disappointed when you can't play the way you want to at the park.
Child: But sometimes I can play in the sand when Daddy takes me to the park.
Therapist: You like going to the park with Daddy.
Child: He doesn't get to go much because he has to work.
Therapist: You feel sad when Daddy can't go to the park with you.
Examples of Responses for helping a child:
Child: What's this? ( pointing to a toy)
Therapist: What do you think that is?
Child: It's a dinosaur!
Therapist: You knew what that was; it's a Dinosaur
Child: Struggling with opening a container
Therapist: Man, that's really tricky to get
Child: not giving up on opening it yt
Therapist: you really want to get this done yourself, but it's really hard
Child: Can you help me?
Therapist: Thank you for asking for help, tell me what you would like me to do
When a child cannot leave the room when session is over
Give all children countdowns, do not just end session without warnings the time is almost up.
"we have 10 minutes left, 5 minutes, 1 minute left"
A child refuses to leave
" I know we had fun today, but our time is over" ( stand up and open the door, keep repeating this statement)
You can offer a lollipop to them or a sticker if needed, or to get their parent. Rarely does it get to the level of needing a parent to remove them.
Final note/ reminders
Kids do not know if you mess up! If you reflect a feeling wrong or say something funny, they won't know or they will just correct you!
You do not have to have all the perfect responses- the biggest focus is on your relationship with them
Play therapy may seem to be all about the child, but your true client is the parent. They need to be actively involved with parent consults, check-ins, and teaching the parent to use similar language as you.
You do not have to have a plan for every child each session, but do try to have a focus you are working towards.
The session does not have to be fun to be effective.