Craig-isms
Craig blends his daily smoothies for roughly this many minutes.
What is five minutes?
Before leaving any house, Craig must complete two important tasks: blowing his nose and doing this activity.
What is turning off all the lights?
While traveling in his twenties, Craig confidently wandered the world wearing this garment.
What is a robe?
During his kids’ high school years, Craig’s preferred nighttime entertainment.
What is watching game film?
For his 40th birthday party at OCC, Craig arrived dressed as this character.
Who is Edward Scissorhands?
Craig is willing to spend half a million dollars making his yard perfect — but when it comes to buying this major item, he becomes extremely frugal.
What is a car?
Craig’s typical highway cruising speed which could best be described as “scenic.”
What is 50 miles per hour?
Craig’s all-time favorite pants to sport around the house.
What are Chris’s oversized red track pants?
Aunt Caca’s affectionate nickname for Craig.
What is Egghead?
At Cal, Craig proudly pledged this fraternity — a place where lifelong friendships were made and perhaps a few rules were bent (refer to Tom Turner).
What is Beta?
Craig’s favorite condiment while the kids were growing up was this creamy classic, slathered on to vegetables like broccoli and asparagus.
What is mayonnaise?
Craig’s go-to gift for his children, typically aged 5 years or more.
What are newspaper clippings?
Craig wore this colored hat for roughly 25 years until it actually disintegrated.
What is his neon hat?
Craig’s favorite sport to watch.
What is basketball?
At one legendary Lafayette party after college, Craig decorated the pool with these.
What are floating gardenias?
When Craig says this word, you may notice several letters have mysteriously disappeared.
What is breakfast (aka brefas)?
Craig’s signature greeting for many men involves delivering one of these enthusiastic gestures.
What is a hard slap on the back?
If Craig is staying overnight, there is one essential item he will never forget to pack — because comfort is non-negotiable.
What are his slippers?
To convince Nance to spend more time with him, Craig famously pretended he didn’t own this and needed a ride home.
What is a car?
The day after a night of partying, Craig most often complains about this unfortunate side effect.
What is not sleeping?
Craig’s all-time favorite saying.
What is “shoot or drive”?
Craig’s foolproof gift-giving strategy for Mom was simply buying this from a store.
What is the entire outfit on a mannequin?
Craig’s most worn sweatshirt of all time — once his go-to uniform.
What is a De La Salle sweatshirt?
Craig once had a warrant out for his arrest at Cal thanks to an impressive collection of these.
What are parking tickets?
Craig once “borrowed” this enormous decorative item from Trader Vic’s to enhance his backyard party décor.
What is a giant shell?