Beginning to STEP
Interpersonal problems can being up strong emotions like anger or stress
True or False
TRUE
It's OK to feel these emotions, but they can make it hard to solve problems
Even the best solutions can go wrong if you don't stop to think about when and where to work on the problem
TRUE or False
TRUE!
Understanding each person's POINT OF VIEW can help you predict which solution will work best
TRUE or FALSE
TRUE!
Reflecting can help you:
a.) learn what worked
b.) learn what didn't work
c.) help you do better next time
d.) all of the above
D.) ALL OF THE ABOVE
We need to calm down before we start problem solving
Please give an example of a healthy calming strategy
Examples
Deep Breathing
Counting
Taking a break
24 hour rule
Please give an example of a calming strategy
Personal examples might include:
Taking deep breaths
Counting
Taking a break to cool down (distractions_
Talking to someone we trust
The T in the STEP problem solving process stands for:
a.) T-Thinking about solutions
b.) T-Timing
c.) T-Teaching
A.) Thinking about solutions
What are the last two steps we learned about the last problem solving process:
1. S-Say the Problem
2.) E-Evaluate Solutions
3.) T-Think about Solutions
4.) P-Pick a Solution
2 and 4
2.) Evaluate Solutions (Thinking about people's wants and needs)
4.) Pick a Solution (Pick one of your solutions to try)
There is always a best solution when working through a problem
TRUE or False
FALSE
Explain what an "interpersonal problem" is
It's a problem between two or more people
What does the S in STEP stand for?
S stands for "Say the problem"
Why is it important to think about WHEN to work on a problem?
So people are calm enough to tackle the problem
The people involved have had time to think about it and what they need or want
In this week's lesson Fernando was invited to swim and bike on the same day with two different people.
He told one friend he was sick and went biking with the other person.
Why didn't this solution work well?
He wasn't honest
He only thought about what he wanted, not what his friend wanted
Jayden's friends are calling the girls "hurtful names". When he brings it up, they say "it's just a joke"
Jayden worries about bringing it up again. So he decides not to say anything, but won't use the hurtful names with the girls
Reflect on how this solution works or doesn't work
He is still uncomfortable/feels awkward
The comments are still hurtful to other people
It doesn't address the problem
How would you feel if......
Your friend said they were sick and couldn't go swimming-but you see them out biking with someone else
Angry
betrayed
Disappointed
ETC
We learned 3 important things to do before we begin the problem solving process
1.) Feeling Calm
2.) Saying the problem respectfully
3.) Deciding if we need an adult's help (safety concerns)
4.) Deciding who, when and where?
1.) Feeling calm
2.) Saying the problem respectfully
3.) Deciding if we need an adults help
Why is it important to think about WHO to include when we are problem solving?
Too many people can make things worse (add to the drama)
The people directly involved can work together on a solution
What could Fernando have done differently?
(Fernando had a conflict because he was asked to bike and swim with different people on the same day)
Personal example/idea
Jayden's friends were calling the girls "hurtful" names.
What was one of the solutions he came up with?
1.) Telling on them
2.) Don't say anything to them, but don't use the hurtful words himself
3.) Ask his friends "Why would you call someone that? It's not funny"
4.) Explained why the word is hurtful and ask them to stop
Explain why thinking about Point of View is important when trying to problem solve
You have a better chance of picking a solution that works for everyone
Two of your friends are in conflict and one of them asks you to pick a side.
How would you say the problem respectfully?
Example provided:
Was the example respectful and without blame?
Rosie was upset with her friend Naomi because she felt Naomi was being rude and ignoring her.
She decided to talk to her friend and posted a message on social Media
Why do you think this solution didn't work as well as she hoped ?
-Posting the message on social media made things worse (other people started to get involved)
-She didn't consider timing and Naomi's performance in the talent show didn't go well
Predictions....
1.) Fernando invites both friends over to his house to hang out (all together)
2.) Fernando avoids both his friends on Saturday
3.) Fernando swims on Saturday with Caleb and goes biking with Damien on Sunday
Predictions given.....
Match the character with the point of view
1.) Jayden a.) To be seen as the funny one
2.) Paolo b.) Friends to be nicer
3.) Noah c.) Wants to be cool by new friend
1.) Jayden is (b)
2.) Paol is (c)
3.) Noah is (a)
Fill in the blanks
S- ___ the problem
T- ______ of solutions
E- _______ solutions
P- _______ a solution
S--SAY
T--THINK
E--EVALUATE
P--PICK