Recognizing Avoidance vs. Ability

Recognizing Avoidance vs. Ability

100

Someone says: "I don't have my homework because my dog ate it."

Truth or avoidance?

• Hint: Think about if this is a real reason or a famous excuse...

AVOIDANCE (you can tell the truth about forgetting)

200

"I asked my teacher twice to explain and I still don't get fractions."

Truth or avoidance?

• Hint: Did this person try first?

TRUTH (you tried to get help)

300

"I'm not doing this worksheet because it's for babies."

A) Truth - it really is too easy
B) Avoidance - hiding that it's actually hard
C) Truth - the teacher made a mistake

B - AVOIDANCE

400

"I can't focus because the classroom is too loud and kids keep talking."

Truth or avoidance?

• Hint: Is the noise REALLY stopping you, or are you also choosing to pay attention to it?

TRUTH (real environmental problem) 

OR 

Could be AVOIDANCE if you didn't try using strategies (moving seats, asking for help, using headphones)

500

"I'll finish this at home tonight, I promise." (But you never do)

Truth or Avoidance?

AVOIDANCE (using "later" to avoid "now")

What Would YOU Do?

100

You have a reading assignment but some words are too hard. What's the RIGHT move?

• Hint: What's better than just saying "I can't"?

Ask for help, try to sound it out, use context clues, ask teacher to read it

200

Your math work looks really long and boring. You feel like saying "this is dumb." Instead, you should:

A) Throw the paper away
B) Say "This feels hard, can you help me start?"
C) Put your head down

B.

300

You rush through your work and get it wrong. The teacher says to check your answers. What's the truth about WHY you rushed?

I wanted to be done fast, I was distracted, I didn't want to think too hard

400

Your friend says "I can't do this" during a group project but won't even try. What do you say to help them see they're avoiding?

• Hint: How can you be a good friend AND call them out nicely?

• "You haven't tried yet. Let's do it together." "What part seems hard?"

500

The teacher gives you work and you immediately feel like giving up. Name 3 TRUE reasons this might happen AND one avoidance thought.

• Hint: Think about your BODY, your BRAIN, and your EXCUSES

TRUE: tired, confused, didn't eat breakfast 

AVOIDANCE: "this is stupid," "I already know this"

Fix the Excuse

100

Excuse: "I don't have a pencil, so I can't work."
Fix it: (Turn it into truth)

• Hint: What's the REAL problem and the REAL solution?

• "I need to ask for a pencil" or "I can borrow one"

200

Excuse: "This is too hard, I'm not even going to try."
Fix it:

• Hint: Change "I can't" to "I need help with..."

"This looks hard. Can someone help me get started?"

300

Excuse: "I already know this stuff, so I don't need to do it."
Fix it to truth:

A) "I don't feel like doing work that seems boring"
B) "I really am too smart for this work"
C) "The teacher made a mistake giving me this"

A - "I don't feel like doing work that seems boring" 

Lesson to learn: Once you admit the TRUTH - 'I don't want to do boring work' - THEN you can ask for something harder OR just do it quickly but correctly to get it over with. But the excuse keeps you stuck! 

400

Excuse: "I'll do it later" (but you know you won't).
Fix it:

• Hint: How can you be honest AND still try a little bit?

"I don't want to do it now, but I'll try to do ___ minutes right now"

500

Excuse: "I'm just not good at reading/math/writing, so why bother?"
Fix it:

• Hint: What's the magic word that means you CAN grow? (rhymes with "pet")

"I'm not good at it YET, but I can practice" or "It's hard for me, but I can get better"

Reading the Clues

100

When your body feels tight and you want to run away from work, that's a clue you're feeling _________.

• Hint: It starts with your FEELINGS before it becomes an excuse

• Frustrated, anxious, overwhelmed, stressed (any work!)

200

You keep looking around the room, tapping your pencil, asking to go to the bathroom. This means:

A) You really need the bathroom
B) You're avoiding the work
C) You're excited about the work

B (usually)

300

TRUE or FALSE: If you can't read a word, that means you're avoiding.

• FALSE (that's a real struggle, not avoidance)

400

Someone says "I can't" before even looking at the paper. What clue tells you it's avoidance?

They didn't try first, they said it too fast, they didn't even read it

500

Name 2 body clues that you're avoiding and 2 word clues (things you say aloud) that you're avoiding.

• Hint: Think about what your BODY does and what your MOUTH says when work feels hard

• Body: looking away, fidgeting, getting up, putting head down
• Words: "this is dumb," "I can't," "I'll do it later," "this is boring"

Real Talk

100

Finish this sentence: "Saying 'I can't' is easier than saying..."

• Hint: What's the TRUTH hiding under "I can't"?

"This is hard" / "I need help"

200

When you avoid something for a long time, what usually happens to that problem?

Hint: Think about homework you skipped or chores you avoided

It gets bigger, it gets worse, it piles up, you get in more trouble, it becomes harder to fix, you fall behind

300

Which of these shows you're being BRAVE and facing something hard?

A) "This is stupid, I'm not doing it"
B) "I don't get this. Can you help me?"
C) "I'll just copy someone else's answers

B

Why: Asking for help means you're admitting something is hard - that takes courage! A and C are both ways of avoiding.

Asking for help is NOT weak - it's actually the bravest choice! It means you're facing the problem instead of running from it.

400

What's the difference between "I can't read this word" and "I'm not going to read this"?

• Hint: One is about ABILITY, one is about CHOICE. Remember which is Truth and Avoidance

• First is truth (can't YET), second is avoidance (choosing not to try)

500

Tell about a time you THOUGHT you couldn't do something, but you actually could when you tried. (Worth double points!)

• Hint: Think about something you can do NOW that used to feel impossible

Personal story (learning to ride a bike, a hard level in a game, a subject in school, etc.)