Friendships
Your crush starts talking to another coworker more often. They also still say hi and chat with you during some lunch breaks.
Green Flag: They might be your crush, but you are still just friends. If you want to see if they are interested- try asking them to hang out first.
Your coworker gets promoted at work and is getting a lot of attention. You start thinking that you're not as good of an employee as your friend.
Red Flag: Just because your friend got promoted- it doesn't mean you are not good at your job too. Next time it could be your turn!
You notice that every time you have good news to share with your friend, they respond by mentioning something more exciting that happened to them. You feel weird- almost like you're competing.
Red Flag: If you think a friend is not being supportive of your victories, it would make sense to think that you are in competition. Let your friend know how you are feeling so they can be more mindful of their choices.
Your best friend just started dating someone and you start feeling left out. Your best friend is spending more time with their partner than you.
Green Flag: When someone is barely starting a romantic relationship, it makes sense that they want to spend time together. But if you're feeling abandoned by your friend- you can always let them know.
You're crushing on your friend. You notice they really care about how many followers they have on social media- so they're always on their phone.
If this was something that annoyed you...:
Red Flag: Even if you have stuff in common, followers/social media/popularity is a very important thing for them. If you disagree with that, you might be too different to be in a long-term relationship.
You run into an old high school friend at Starbucks- but you're still in your dirty work uniform. They're coming over to say hello.
Green Flag: If they're walking over to you, they must be glad to see you! You can let them know what you've been up to since graduation.
Your best friend has a girlfriend you also think is cute. One day you're hanging out together and you try to kiss her.
Red Flag: That's not fair to your best friend- even if she accepts the kiss. Getting in between someone's relationship is unkind.
While on your way to your best friend's house, you saw his girlfriend hanging out with another guy. They were having ice cream together by themselves. Should you mention it to your friend?
Green Flag: You don't know the details, but you can focus on the facts. Letting your friend know what you saw could be helpful, as long as you remain neutral. Don't worry about your friend's reaction, that's their choice. Focus on your choice so that you can regulate your own emotions.
Your girlfriend/boyfriend/partner asks to be in an open relationship. They want to bring in a third person- you're unsure how you feel about that.
Red Flag: If you do not feel comfortable with something, you DO NOT have to go through with it. Tell your partner how you feel. In a healthy relationship- your partner should understand and respect your feelings.
Your girlfriend/boyfriend/best friend/partner starts reading more and working out more often. You notice that they are getting promotions at work and compliments from strangers (bartenders, store clerks, etc.)
You think about joining them on their next workout
Green Flag: If your person is making positive changes without isolating you from their life (and this motivates you to do the same)- this seems like a healthy relationship.
Sounds like you may find new things you have in common.