Revision
(5) Livy and Hailey are twins, but Livy was born with many health problems. (6) Livy is unable to speak or walk, and sometimes she has to spend time in the hospital. (7) She also has epilepsy, which is a brain condition that causes a person to have seizures. (8) There are different types of seizures, and many cause muscles to shake or jerk. (9) There are other kinds of brain conditions that people can be born with, too.
Jake has included an unnecessary sentence in the second paragraph (sentences 5–9). Which sentence should be deleted from this paragraph?
A. Sentence 5
B. Sentence 7
C. Sentence 8
D. Sentence 9
D. Sentence 9
(5) I was uncomfortable in small spaces, and afraid that we might get lost.
What change, if any, should be made in sentence 5?
A Delete the comma
B Change and to I was
C Change we to you
D No change is needed in sentence 5.
A Delete the comma
You cannot go to the party _______ you didn't do your chores.
Which of these is the correct AAAWWUBIS?
A. unless
B. if
C. before
D. while
B. if
What is the best way to combine the following sentences?
October is my favorite month. Spring is my favorite season.
October is my favorite month, but spring is my favorite season.
(15) First, she drew a bright painting, where she drew pink flowers, ladybugs, and a butterfly.
What is the best way to revise sentence 15?
F. First, she drew a bright painting, drawing bright pink flowers, ladybugs, and a butterfly.
G. First, she drew a bright painting with pink flowers, ladybugs, and a butterfly.
H. First, she drew a bright painting, the painting had bright pink flowers, ladybugs, and also a butterfly.
J. Sentence 15 does not need to be revised.
G. First, she drew a bright painting with pink flowers, ladybugs, and a butterfly.
(1) It was a beautiful sunny day, and the park was filled with families enjoying a lazy Sunday afternoon together. (2) Daniel had noticed some ants nearby, but he wasn’t concerned. (3) He had seen a lot of ants at picnics before. (4) These were fire ants.
Sadah would like to replace sentence 4 with a sentence that helps create a more effective opening for her story. Which of the following can replace sentence 4 and improve this paper’s opening?
A. But Daniel didn’t know that the ants in this park were fire ants.
B. But his family had had picnics at many different parks in their old city.
C. But Daniel and his parents had seen a lot of ants at other picnics too.
D. But when ants came around, Daniel’s mom knew just what to do.
A.But Daniel didn’t know that the ants in this park were fire ants.
(11) My heart raced, but I kept putting one foot in front of the other. (12) As we walked, the ceiling dropped lower and lower untill we had to crawl on our hands and knees. (13) The smaller the opening got, the more anxious I felt.
What change, if any, should be made in sentence 12?
A Change dropped to droped
B Change untill to until
C Change hands and knees to hand’s and knee’s
D Make no change
B Change untill to until
I watched TV ________ my dad cooked dinner.
Which of these is the correct AAAWWUBIS?
A.if
B.because
C.while
D.unless
C. while
What is the best way to combine the following sentences?
The cake was delicious, It was chocolate.
The chocolate cake was delicious.
(8)In the early days Girl Scouts sold only original sandwich, chocolate mint, and shortbread cookies. (9) There are many interesting flavors available, including lemon, peanut butter, and caramel.
Samantha needs to add a transition word or phrase to help her readers move from sentence 8 to sentence 9.
Which transition could BEST be added to the beginning of sentence 9?
A.After all
B.Today
C.At first
D.Then
B.Today
. (31) Lauren knows that whoever it is will not reach her in time to save her. (32) The rhino is approaching too fast. (33) Suddenly Lauren feels a stabbing pain in it. (34) The rhino has rammed her! (35) Lauren cries out and doubles over.
The meaning of sentence 33 is unclear. It can be clarified by changing it to —
A.her game
B.her shoulder
C.the voice
D.the rhino
B.her shoulder
(11) My heart raced, but I kept putting one foot in front of the other. (12) As we walked the ceiling dropped lower and lower untill we had to crawl on our hands and knees. (13) The smaller the opening got, the more anxious I felt.
What change if any needs to be made in sentence 12?
A. Change As to as
B. Change hands to Hands
C. Place a comma after walked.
D. No change needs to be made.
C. Place a comma after walked.
We cannot get more groceries _______ we get the refrigerator fixed.
Which of these is the correct AAAWWUBIS?
A.since
B.while
C.because
D.until
D. until
What is the best way to combine the following sentences?
I played softball last year. My position was first base.
I played softball last year, and my position was first base.
(27) Today, Hailey sells her art and bracelets through Livy’s Hope. (28) The money she raises now helps many families. (29) Each year, Livy’s Hope also runs a “Lemonade for Livy” event. (30) People set up lemonade stands during the last weekend in July. (31) They give the money they raise to the Epilepsy Foundation. (32) In 2014, people in 47 states set up lemonade stands!
Jake’s seventh paragraph (sentences 27–32) needs a closing sentence. Which of the following should be added after sentence 32 to help close this paragraph?
F.This event is held only one month each year.
G.They could earn even more money by also selling iced tea and food.
H.Everyone who helps run the charity hopes people will continue to support this wonderful event.
J.Other groups that help people should set up lemonade stands because these stands are a huge success.
H. Everyone who helps run the charity hopes people will continue to support this wonderful event.
(6) She easily catches and returns a frightened koala bear and a small zebra. (7) Then suddenly the screen freezes up. (8) Annoyed, Lauren starts pushing buttons in an attempt to reset the game. (9) As she pushes button after button, she hears a growl. (10) “Wow,” she thinks. (11) “The special effects in this game are so realistic! (12) It not only sounds like an animal is nearby but smells like it!”
Mitchell would like to add the following sentence to the second paragraph (sentences 6–12).
Feeling startled, she shakes her head and sits up straight.
Where is the BEST place to insert this sentence?
A.At the beginning of the paragraph
B.After sentence 6
C.After sentence 8
D.After sentence 9
D. After sentence 9
(18) I was surprised at how peaceful it felt. (19) Dad suggested that we sit on a rock. (20) And turn off our headlamps. (21) Up to that moment I had never experienced total darkness.
What is the correct way to write sentences 19 and 20?
A Dad suggested that we sit on a rock, we turned off our headlamps.
B Dad suggested that we sit on a rock and turn off our headlamps.
C Dad suggesting that we sit on a rock and turn off our headlamps.
D Sentences 19 and 20 are correct in the paper. Page
B Dad suggested that we sit on a rock and turn off our headlamps.
My sister always listens to music ________ she does her homework.
Which of these is the correct AAAWWUBIS?
A.since
B.although
C.because
D.when
D. when
What is the best way to combine the following sentences?
Monday is a school holiday. The class will take the test on Tuesday.
Monday is a school holiday, so the class will take the test on Tuesday.
(25) Jennifer Sharpe’s story shows that the Girl Scout cookie program is accomplishing its goals. (26) That’s why I love Girl Scout cookies. Samantha wants to add a conclusion to her paper.
Which of the following could BEST follow sentence 26 and close this paper?
A They don’t just taste good. They also do good things for girls.
B They’re so tasty.
C And I’m so proud of Jennifer Sharpe. She’s amazing!
D Let’s go buy them!
A They don’t just taste good. They also do good things for girls.
(1) When someone does something nice for you, you probably want to pay that person back. (2) But some people choose to do something different. (3) They’re paying it forward! (4) In the process they hope to become part of a chain of good deeds that will grow and grow.
Derrick wants to further develop the central idea of this paper by adding a detail after sentence 3. Which of these sentences could BEST follow and support sentence 3?
A.Pay it forward today if you have an opportunity to do this.
B.That means they’re doing something nice by helping another person who may be in need.
C.This is different and not the same as paying someone back.
D.I had a friend who helped me when I had to clean out my garage.
B. That means they’re doing something nice by helping another person who may be in need.
(29) Slowly we began to crawl. (30) We traveled the same path, but this time I felt different.
What is the correct way to write sentences 29 and 30?
A Slowly we began to crawl, we traveled the same path, but this time I felt different.
B Slowly we began to crawl. Traveling the same path, but feeling different this time.
C Slowly we began to crawl, and travel the same path. But feeling different this time.
D Sentences 29 and 30 are correct.
D Sentences 29 and 30 are correct in the paper.
Natalie is hungry ________ she forgot to eat breakfast this morning.
Which of these is the correct AAAWWUBIS?
A.because
B.while
C.wherever
D.until
A. Because
What is the best way to combine the following sentences?
I washed the dishes yesterday. I made the beds today.
I washed the dishes yesterday, so I made the beds today.
(11) The tasty cookies sell for about $3.50 a box. (12) More than 200 million boxes are sold each year, which adds up to more than $700 million a year for the Girl Scouts! (13) But leaders say that raising money isn’t the only reason Girl Scouts sell cookies. (14) Ordering and selling cookies helps girls get better in important ways. (15) Each girl learns how to operate a small business, manage customers, and set financial goals. (16) These skills can help them become self-assured and resourceful businesswomen in the future.
Samantha would like to add the following sentence to the third paragraph (sentences 11–16). In fact, some of today’s most successful businesswomen say they got their start by selling Girl Scout cookies. Where is the BEST place to insert this sentence?
A At the beginning of the paragraph
B After sentence 13
C At the end of the paragraph
D This sentence should not be added to the paragraph.
C At the end of the paragraph