Revising 1
(6) I enjoyed going on this trip with my grandparents. (7) They knew the best places to go and shared many interesting details about the park. (8) During our drive, they told me that Yellowstone covers more than 3,000 square miles. (9) It crosses three state lines and five national forests. (10) It is also home to countless wild animals. (11) There are so many animals there. (12) I couldn’t wait to see it all for myself.
Which sentence in this paragraph repeats information and should be removed?
Sentence 11
(10) Some people even bring trash bags stuffed with teddy bears. (11) They are clear trash bags.
What is the BEST way to combine sentences 10 and 11?
A Some people even bring trash bags stuffed with teddy bears in clear bags.
B Some people even bring teddy bears and clear trash bags and stuffed.
C Some people even bring trash bags stuffed with teddy bears and clear.
D Some people even bring clear trash bags stuffed with teddy bears.
D Some people even bring clear trash bags stuffed with teddy bears.
(2) Her father was a Farmer.
What change should be made in sentence 2?
A Change Her to Hers
B Change was to been
C Change Farmer to farmer
D Change the period to a comma
C Change Farmer to farmer
(4) These behaviors is acts of littering.
What change should be made in sentence 4?
A Change These to Thease
B Change is to are
C Change acts to act’s
D Change the period to a comma
B Change is to are
(3) They make students feel as if they are part for a team.
What change should be made in sentence 3?
A Change make to made
B Change feel to felt
C Change they are to them are
D Change for to of
D Change for to of
(13) Finally, we started our tour. (14) A geyser is an opening in the Earth’s surface. (15) Hot water and steam shoot into the sky from the opening. (16) Yellowstone is on top of volcanic rock, and this creates many geysers. (17) One is more famous than all the others. (18) It is named Old Faithful. (19) We had to wait around for the famous geyser to erupt. (20) A park ranger told us that it can take a while. (21) But once that geyser finally went off, it was an amazing sight to see!
Carter needs a better topic sentence for the third paragraph (sentences 13–21). Which sentence should replace sentence 13?
A We finally got to the park, and we started looking around.
B I was going to love seeing everything, including the animals.
C My grandparents wanted to show me a famous geyser first.
D There were so many things to do at the park once we arrived.
C My grandparents wanted to show me a famous geyser first.
(14) On December 1, 2019, the Hershey Bears skated onto the ice to play. (15) It had been a cold winter in Pennsylvania. (16) Just a few minutes into the game, the Bears scored. (17) Within seconds, thousands of teddy bears came raining down on the ice. (18) Bear after bear was tossed from the highest seats to lower seats.
Mallory has included a sentence that does not belong in the third paragraph (sentences 14–21). Which sentence should she remove?
A Sentence 15
B Sentence 16
C Sentence 17
D Sentence 18
A Sentence 15
(5) During the Civil War, she took care for wounded soldiers.
What change should be made in sentence 5?
A Change During to Durring
B Change for to of
C Change took to tooken
D Change soldiers to Soldiers
B Change for to of
(9) An animal might eat a bag, and this could hurt the animals stomach.
What change should be made in sentence 9?
A Change eat to ate
B Delete the comma after bag
C Change hurt to hert
D Change animals to animal’s
D Change animals to animal’s
(5) Some Teachers think these jobs are easy.
What change should be made in sentence 5?
A Change Teachers to teachers
B Change think to thought
C Change easy to easier
D Change the period to a question mark
A Change Teachers to teachers
(23) Fortunately, many animals were out.
Which sentence would BEST follow and support sentence 23?
A We took pictures of elk, bison, and sheep grazing in the valley.
B We were very happy to see so many animals were out and eating.
C Earlier we had seen a powerful waterfall crashing over a cliff.
D The park was full of excited visitors from many places that day.
A We took pictures of elk, bison, and sheep grazing in the valley.
(18) People should be able to relax, and people should be able to enjoy a meal.
How should sentence 18 be revised so that it does not repeat information?
A. People should be able to relax and enjoy a meal.
B. People should be able to relax but enjoy a meal and people.
C. People should relax and enjoy to be able for a meal.
D. People should be able to relax, so people should enjoy a meal.
A. People should be able to relax and enjoy a meal.
(8) And learned about the International Red Cross.
Sentence 8 is written incorrectly. Select the ONE response that corrects this sentence.
A And learned. About the International Red Cross.
B She learned about the International Red Cross.
C Learning about the International Red Cross.
D She learned about it. The International Red Cross.
B She learned about the International Red Cross.
(2) Doing chores such as erasing the board or collecting papers saved everyone time.
What change should be made in sentence 2?
A Change Doing to Do
B Change chores to Chores
C Charge board to bored
D Change saved to saves
D Change saved to saves
(3) "Can I give you some tips?" her friends Emily asked with a sweet smile.
What change needs to be made in sentence 3?
A Change the question mark to a period
B Change her to our
C Change friends to friend
D Change with to in
C Change friends to friend
(29) We were visiting and it was summer and the bright green of the trees and meadows.
What is the BEST way to revise sentence 29?
A We were visiting in the summer, but the bright green in the trees and meadows.
B We were visiting the trees and the meadows and the bright green summer.
C We were visiting in the summer, and the trees and meadows were bright green.
D We were visiting the bright green trees and meadows and the summer.
C We were visiting in the summer, and the trees and meadows were bright green.
(28) On that day, they collected 45,650 stuffed animals that day!
Sentence 28 repeats information. On your white board, rewrite sentence 28 in a clear and effective way.
On that day, they collected 45,650 stuffed animals!
OR
They collected 45,650 stuffed animals that day!
(2) Others toss soda cans and gum wrapper out the window.
What change should be made in sentence 2?
A Change toss to tossing
B Change soda to Soda
C Change wrapper to wrappers
D Change out to in
C Change wrapper to wrappers
(8) They can help keep the classroom organized and neatly on busy school days.
What change should be made in sentence 8?
A Change can help to helped
B Change neatly to neat
C Change busy to buzy
D Change school to skool
B Change neatly to neat
(8) Suddenly Callie felt a big grin stretching in her face.
What change needs to be made in sentence 8?
A Change felt to feeling
B Change big to bigger
C Change stretching to streching
D Change in to across
D Change in to across