Easy
What type of music is a mummy's favorite?
Wrap
Where do you take a sick boat?
To the dock.
What is the longest word in the dictionary?
Smiles (there is a mile between the two S's)
I am six letters. When you take one away I am twelve. What am I?
The word "Dozens."
What do you call it when your parachute doesn't open?
Jumping to a conclusion.
What goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow continuously?
Bubble gum.
How do monkeys make toast?
They put it under the g'rilla.
A beggar's brother died, but the man who died had no brother.
How could that be?
The beggar was his sister.
No matter how little or how much you use me, you change me every month. What am I?
A calendar
I'm so fast you can't see me, though everyone else can see straight through me. I don't stop until the day you die. What am I?
The blink of an eye.
Why was the nose so tired?
Because it was running all day.
What can you catch but not throw?
A cold.
How do you know that a vampire loves baseball?
Because it turns into a bat every night.
I run in and out of town all day and night. What am I?
A road
A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of police officers with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?
The third. Lions that haven't eaten in three years are dead.
What did one math book say to the other math book?
Do you want to hear my problems?
Why did they let the Turkey join the thanksgiving band?
Because it has drumsticks.
Why can't the world ever come to an end?
Because it is a sphere/ is round.
It has a long neck, A name of a bird, Feeds on cargo of ships, It's not alive,
What is it?
A crane
There are 30 cows in a field, and 28 chickens. How many didn't?
Listen closely: 30 cows, and twenty-eight chickens. Say EIGHT and ATE. They sound the same. Therefore, it means 20 ATE chickens. 30-20=10, so 10 cows didn't eat any chickens.
There are 9 fish in a tank.
-2 drown
-4 under eat
-3 swim away
How many fish are left in the tank?
All of the fish are still there, they are just dead.
A man in a car saw a Golden Door, Silver Door and a Bronze Door. What door did he open first?
The car door.
I act like a cat, I look like a cat, Yet I am not a cat. What am I?
A kitten
A man pushes a car to a hotel and suddenly loses all fortune. What happened?
He stopped at the enemy's hotel in Monopoly.
There is a brother and a sister. The boy wants to visit his father in jail, and the sister wants to visit her mother in the hospital. But they both are not allowed in the jail or hospital. All they have is a gun. What do they do?
The boy shoots the girl, and then the boy goes to jail for attempted murder and the girl goes to the hospital due to her injuries.