A
What are two things you can never eat for breakfast?
Lunch and Dinner
What is it that lives if it is fed, and dies if you give it a drink?
Fire
A girl fell off a 50-foot ladder but didn’t get hurt. How come?
She fell of the bottom step
If it takes eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men?
No time , because the wall is already built.
If you had only one match and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some kindling wood, and a newspaper, which would you light first?
Nothing
What is always coming but never arrives?
Tommorow
What never asks a question but gets answered all the time?
A Cellphone
If you have one, you want to share it. But once you share it, you do not have it. What is it?
A secret
You spot a boat full of people but there isn’t a single person on board. How is that possible?
Everyone is married.
If you spell “sit in the tub” s-o-a-k, and you spell “a funny story” j-o-k-e, how do you spell “the white of an egg”?
E-G-G W-H-I-T-E
What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel
What word would you use to describe a man who does not have all his fingers on one hand?
Normal, because people usually have half their fingers on one hand.
What starts with “e” and ends with “e” but only has one letter in it?
An envelope
If you have a bowl with six apples, and you take away four, how many do you have?
The 4 you took
A cowboy rode into town on Friday. He stayed in town for three days and rode out on Friday. How is that possible?
His horse is named Friday
What can be broken but never held?
Promise
What goes up but never ever comes down?
Your Age
If a plane crashes on the border between the United States and Canada, where do they bury the survivors?
If you have a bowl with six apples, and you take away four, how many do you have?
Add a ‘G’ and it’s gone!
Is it legal for a man to marry his widow’s sister?
No, but since he is dead it would be hard to do so
What word is spelled incorrectly in every single dictionary?
Incorrectly
What can one catch that is not thrown?
A cold
How can a girl go 25 days without sleep?
She sleeps at night
If you had only one match and entered a dark room containing an oil lamp, some kindling wood, and a newspaper, which would you light first?
The match
What two keys can’t open any door?
A monkey and a donkey