Emotional Expression
Share with the class how you feel about this school semester?
stressed - so many projects
relieved its almost over
overwhelmed - full course load
What does high assertiveness look like to you?
Can speak up for yourself
strong communicator
stand up for what you feel is important
Share with the class a time where you were not as assertive and knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?
Did all the work in a group project
Didn't speak up during business meeting
Don't set healthy boundaries with family or friends
What do you think the dark side may look like for high independence?
don't think you need anyone
take on too much - never ask for help
may struggle in teams or group work
Share with the class, a way someone could increase their independence?
Make day-to-day decisions without consulting others (ie what to eat for dinner, what produce to buy etc)
Practise contributing your ideas to become more comfortable and confident with them
Sit with other classmates other than your best friend
how does low emotional expression impact your relationships?
people may see you as withdrawn
may struggle to understand you
may feel hurt that you don't open up to them
may be confused or misunderstand/misread how you are feeling
How may high assertiveness benefit you at work?
Share ideas in meetings
Set healthy work life boundaries
Get pay raise/promotion by asking for it/ opening a conversation
Situation:
You are struggling to understand the concepts in one of your courses and you have an assignment due next week. What may a low assertive response look like?
Doesn't ask for help
doesn't speak up in class to clarify concepts
accepts a low mark on the assignment
Share with the class a way you are independent?
live on your own
support yourself financially
take classes with no one you know
How can low independence affect your relationship with others?
may find you needy or high maintenance
may feel that they have to hold your hand
Share a time, where you responded to a situation in a non constructive way ie became too emotional. started yelling swearing etc?
didn't handle rejection well
How may the dark side of assertiveness hinder your personal relationships with others?
your way or the highway
difficult to work with
may hurt feelings
What does low assertiveness look like to you?
not standing up for yourself
agreeing to people please
staying silent to avoid conflict
How may high independence benefit you at school?
can work in groups projects with strangers
Can share ideas without needing reassurance they are correct
What may low independence look like at school?
getting notes from others instead of taking your own
waiting for others to contribute in a team meeting before you do
agreeing with the group for reassurance
What could be the dark side to emotional expression?
Oversharing with strangers
making people feel uncomfortable
not listening to others and hogging a conversation
Situation:
you are at a restaurant with friends and you ordered your steak medium-rare and it comes to the table medium-well. What would a high assertiveness response be?
Politely call over the waiter, explain the situation and ask for a new steak
Situation:
Your friend keeps interrupting and cutting you off in a conversation. what would a low assertiveness response look like?
says nothing and just lets them keep talking to avoid contact or add tension to the relationship
Share with the class a time or situation where you were independent?
Living on your own
Moving to a new country
Going to movies or events by yourself
Share with the class a time you relied too heavily on others or their opinions/ viewpoints?
asked your friends if your outfit was cute before going out
asked your sister if you should say yes to a date
making your partner always chose the restaurant when going out
Situation:
Your boss comes to you angry because you and a colleague made a mistake that cost the company $10,000. How can you respond with strong emotional expression?
Recognize your feelings ie angry, hurt etc
take a deep breath and do not get defensive
when calm explain that you are frustrated because while you recognize that a mistake was made, you feel like there is not enough resources to get the job done and feel.
ensure your body language is open and receptive to the feedback. open palms relaxed shoulders etc
Share with the class a time where you were successfully assertive?
told a family member you could not drive them to all of their apointments
Told a boss why you deserve the promotion
Shared your ideas in a group project
How can you strengthen your assertiveness?
be confident, posture, body language tone of voice
set boundaries
speak your truth
Situation:
You feel that your hard work at work is undervalued. What may a high indendence response look like
Evaluate yourself and know your own worth
Not seek validation from others
Advocate for yourself professionally at meetings
Situation:
You and your friends are going out for dinner and you have never been to the restaurant before. You open the menu and are overwhelmed with the choices. What may a low independence response look like?
Only ordering once your friends have ordered
Asking them what you should get
Waiting until they order and choosing the exact same thing