Starting a Conversation
Which of the following is the best way to start a conversation
1. interrupt the person if they look busy
2. walk up to the person you want to talk to and say, "Hi"
3. only talk about things you like
2. walk up to the person you want to talk to and say, "Hi"
Greetings are an easy way to start a conversation with someone.
True or False: you can only use the conversation stoplight in two-person conversations.
False.
The conversation stoplight is helpful for all conversations with 2 people or 20!
Sam asks Gretchen if she would like to join his team basketball after lunch. She stares at her food and says, "there are a too many peas on my plate." Did Gretchen drive or stop the conversation?
Stop
she didn't use and on-topic response or look at Sam.
Your friends are talking about building a snowman. What can you say/do to join the conversation?
1. run up and throw a snowball at them
2. say, "I like to go sledding"
3. ask, "Can I help you make a snowman?"
3. ask, "Can I help you make a snowman?"
Choosing an on-topic comment or question can help you join an ongoing discussion. Remember to watch for those yellow light moments to know you can talk soon.
1. say, "it was nice talking to you."
2. walk away while the other person is still talking
3. say, "I'm done talking now"
1. say, "it was nice talking to you."
this is a polite way to end a conversation
What should you do after greeting someone, making a comment, or asking a question when starting a conversation?
watch for interested clues like body language, verbal responses, or facial expressions
The conversation stoplight helps use know when it is our turn to do what?
talk, listen, and/or plan
Kevin asked Millie how her weekend was. She turned to face him and answered. It made Kevin feel happy and like she was interested in talking to him. Was Millie using conversation drivers or stoppers?
Drivers
She used interested body language and made a connected comment
Bill's two friends are talking about a movie they just saw. Bill joins the conversation by saying, "I can't wait for school to be over." Was Bill's comment on-topic or off-topic?
off-topic
using an off-topic comment/question to join a conversation can make people confused or feel like you weren't listening to them
Mikael is reading a book and looks like he is really interested in what he is reading. Would he make a good conversation partner right now? Why?
No, because he is doing something else, and his non-verbal language is showing he is really interested in what he is currently doing. We can infer that he would not want to be bothered.
Before starting a conversation with someone which is the most important thing to do first?
1. greet the person
2. plan a topic
3. watch for interested clues
2. plan a topic
you should plan a topic that all of the people in the conversation could be interested in
What does the "red light" in a conversation mean?
it's time to stop talking and listen
Alex starts telling his baseball coach all about his favorite movie. His coach says, "MMM," and nods but doesn't look towards him or ask any questions. How did Alex's choice of topic stop the conversation?
He chose a topic only he liked
He talked about a topic an adult may not like (i.e., didn't use his topic radar)
Kelly tells Pedro she won the track meet over the weekend. What is an on-topic comment Pedro could make that would drive the conversation forward?
Congratulations on your win
that's awesome
anything positive that is on topic
If you ignore the conversation stoplight how would that make the people you are talking to feel?
Annoyed, confused, mad, sad
Mike walks up to Cameron and says, "Hey, did you hear about the guy who barfed in the hallway?" Cameron has a disgusted look on his face and says, "dude, gross." Should Mike continue the conversation? Why?
Mike should end the conversation
Cameron is using facial expressions and verbal responses that show he is not interested in the conversation topic.
prepare your thoughts for when it is your turn to talk
Name 2 conversation drivers and 2 conversation stoppers.
drivers: maintain eye contact, use body language to show interest, make connected comments, share conversation time, use topic radar (i.e., think of other's interests)
stoppers: losing eye contact, not showing interest, going off topic, talking too much or not letting others have a turn, only talking about yourself/your interests
Brandon sees Jermaine walking by and stops him saying, "dude, guess what? I got the best news ever this weekend!" Jermaine looks away and says, "oh cool" and keeps walking. How did Jermaine make Brandon feel? Also, what inference can we make about Jermaine based on his behavior?
Brandon may have felt hurt or sad or confused
We can infer that Jermaine was not in a good mood or not interested in talking.
If making direct eye contact with other people bothers you, where is a good place to look that still shows people you are interested in talking/listening?
you can look at their nose or forehead
you can look at their eyes for short amounts of time and then take quick breaks by looking away
When starting a conversation with someone the following behaviors will give what type of impression about you?
Not sharing your thoughts, pretending to be someone else, acting disinterested
all of those will leave a not so good impression of you
it's better to share your thoughts, act like yourself, and show interest by asking questions
Casey, Max, and Jemma are all talking about playing Candyland when they were little. Casey says, "I always loved getting to Queen Frostine."
After a short pause Max added, "my favorite was Lord Licorice, a truly underrated Candyland character if you ask me."
They all laugh then Jemma adds, "I didn't have a favorite, but I know I hated getting stuck on the Gloppy spot!" They all nod in agreement.
What conversational stoplights are being used by each person in the 3 parts of the conversation?
Casey, Max, and Jemma are all talking about playing Candyland when they were little. Casey says, "I always loved getting to Queen Frostine."
Part 1: Casey = green, Max & Jemma = red
After a short pause Max added, "my favorite was Lord Licorice, a truly underrated Candyland character if you ask me."
Part 2: Max = yellow and green, Casey & Jemma = red
They all laugh then Jemma adds, "I didn't have a favorite, but I know I hated getting stuck on the Gloppy spot!" They all nod in agreement.
Part 3: Jemma = yellow and green, Casey & Max = red and yellow
Stacy was telling Anne about her basketball game. Anne says, "I don't really like basketball. I prefer track." Stacy says, "oh, sorry." Then Anne continues, "I am really good at track. I have been running everyday afterschool. I want to be the state champion in cross-country this year." Stacy looks away and doesn't say anything else.
Did Anne drive or stop the conversation? What were the drivers/stoppers used? (need at least 2)
Anne stopped the conversation
She was not interested in Stacy's topic
She didn't share the conversation
She only talked about her topic
Ben was telling Callie about his new favorite YouTube channel. Callie said, "oh cool, I love stuff about animals." Rich said, "yeah, he has new animal content every week. You should check it out." Nancy waited for a pause in the conversation and asked, "Are you talking about Brave Wilderness? I love that guy!"
How did everyone maintain the topic of conversation?
They all talked about the same topic
Nancy used the conversation stoplight to know when to join the conversation
They added connected comments that drove the conversation forward
Give an example of someone using the conversation stoplight AND a conversation driver in a group conversation.
any example that shows both being used in a group