We are all distorted
This distortion turns life into a Netflix show with only two episodes: Total Success or Epic Failure. Example: “I forgot to reply to one email, so I’m the world’s worst employee.”
What is black-and-white (all-or-nothing) thinking?
This coping skill is like giving your brain new glasses. Example: Instead of “I’m doomed to fail this group project,” you try, “Maybe we’ll learn something even if it’s messy.”
What is cognitive reframing (restructuring)?
This measure of time between heartbeats is like jazz: the more flexible the rhythm, the healthier you are. Low scores, though, make your body play the “Sad Trombone” theme.
What is heart rate variability (HRV)?
This famous father of psychoanalysis once tried to cure everything with cocaine — proving he may have been his own best client.
Who is Sigmund Freud?
In Good Will Hunting, Robin Williams’ therapist character proves you don’t need a couch — just the line “It’s not your fault” repeated like a broken record to make grown men cry.
Who is Sean Maguire?
DBT is built on this philosophical idea that two seemingly opposite things can both be true — like “I’m doing my best” and “I need to do better”… or “I love my family” and “they drive me absolutely insane.”
What is dialectical thinking?
In ACT, this technique helps you stop fusing with your thoughts — kind of like realizing you’re not actually the main character in your brain’s Netflix drama. Example: saying, “I’m having the thought that I’m a failure,” instead of “I am a failure.”
What is cognitive defusion?
This distortion makes a paper cut feel like the opening scene of a medical drama. Example: “My boss said ‘we need to talk’… guess I’ll be homeless by Tuesday.”
What is catastrophizing?
This DBT skill helps you survive emotional hurricanes without building a permanent bunker. Example: Taking a cold shower instead of texting your ex at 2 a.m.
What is distress tolerance?
This “wandering” nerve is like the body’s Wi-Fi, connecting brain to gut, heart, and more. When it’s strong, you chill. When it’s weak, your stress response drops calls like a bad cell provider.
What is the vagus nerve?
In the 18th and 19th centuries, people sometimes paid a ticket fee to tour these institutions, as if patients were animals in a zoo. (Talk about terrible Yelp reviews.)
What are insane asylums?
This character once said, “The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma,” while imagining spilled milk. Psychologists might call that a case study in anxiety with extra bubbles.
He lives underwater
Who is SpongeBob SquarePants?
According to DBT, this theory explains that emotional sensitivity isn’t a character flaw — it’s what happens when a biologically reactive person grows up in a world that says “you’re overreacting.”
What is the biosocial theory?
This ACT skill asks you to picture your thoughts floating by like cars in a parade — so instead of jumping on the clown car, you just wave politely and let it pass.
What is observing thoughts mindfully / letting thoughts come and go?
This distortion convinces you that your coworker’s resting face means they secretly hate your haircut. Example: “She didn’t say hi… she must think I’m a loser.”
What is mind reading?
This ACT strategy is like telling your thoughts to sit in the back seat instead of driving the car. Example: “Thanks, brain, for the ‘I’m unlovable’ thought — noted, now please shut up.”
What is cognitive defusion?
Nicknamed the “gas pedal,” this system makes your heart race, palms sweat, and brain scream “RUN!”—even if the only threat is opening your credit card bill.
What is the sympathetic nervous system?
This Russian scientist’s dogs drooled so much they basically invented the first wet-floor signs in psychology.
Who is Ivan Pavlov?
This late comedian turned his battles with addiction and depression into legendary stand-up routines, showing that sometimes laughter really is medicine (and sometimes it isn’t).
Who is Robin Williams?
This DBT concept sits halfway between Emotion Mind and Reasonable Mind — it’s that rare inner voice that doesn’t text your ex or make a spreadsheet about it.
What is Wise Mind?
ACT says to drop the rope in your struggle with uncomfortable feelings, because fighting anxiety is like playing tug-of-war with a monster that never skips arm day.
What is acceptance (ending experiential avoidance)?
This distortion is like using one bad date to write your autobiography: “I burned dinner once, so clearly I should never be allowed near a stove again.”
What is overgeneralization?
This practice is about paying attention on purpose… without judgment. Example: Noticing your snack tastes like cardboard, and resisting the urge to sue the cracker company.
What is mindfulness?
This system is the body’s brake pedal, helping you rest and digest. Example: It’s why your body knows how to chill after Thanksgiving dinner instead of launching into fight-or-flight against mashed potatoes.
What is the parasympathetic nervous system?
In the mid-1900s, this brain surgery was handed out so casually, it was nicknamed the “ice pick special.” Spoiler: it didn’t come with free fries.
What is a lobotomy?
Before becoming Gotham’s most famous criminal psychiatrist-turned-villain, this character fell in love with her patient — proving that boundaries are important, especially if your client is a clown.
Who is Harley Quinn (Dr. Harleen Quinzel)?
This DBT principle means you don’t have to agree with someone to make them feel seen — kind of like saying, “I get why you’re upset,” instead of, “You’re wrong, but louder.”
What is validation?
In ACT, these are like your inner compass, not your GPS — they give direction but not a finish line. Example: “Being a caring friend” rather than “Calling my friend today.”
What are values?
This distortion lets your feelings moonlight as fact checkers. Example: “I feel like a failure… so I must BE a failure.”
What is emotional reasoning?
This DBT skill asks you to stop wrestling with reality and just accept the ref’s call. Example: “Yes, traffic sucks. No, my screaming won’t magically part the freeway like Moses.”
What is radical acceptance?
This hormone, when chronically elevated, basically turns your body into a reality TV drama: extra fat storage, bad sleep, mood swings, and zero patience for slow baristas.
What is cortisol?
This infamous study had people “shock” strangers because a man in a lab coat told them to. The real shocker? How many obeyed.
What is the Milgram obedience experiment?
This comedian turned his social anxiety and awkwardness into an Emmy-winning show, proving that therapy can also come with a laugh track.
Who is Larry David (Curb Your Enthusiasm)?
In DBT, this is like crime scene investigation for your emotions — you retrace the “scene of the meltdown” to find what triggered the explosion before you call in emotional SWAT.
What is a behavior chain analysis?
This ACT concept helps you notice when you’re either moving toward your values or away from them — basically a mindfulness version of “recalculating route.”
What is the choice point?
This distortion turns your inner voice into a grumpy drill sergeant. Example: “I should work out every single day, or I’m worthless!”
What are should statements?
This set of techniques pulls you back to Earth when your brain is on Mars. Example: Counting five things you see, four things you feel, three things you hear… and realizing your dog is farting in the background.
What are grounding skills?
This “second brain” lives in your belly and communicates with your mind through microbes. Ignore it, and suddenly Taco Tuesday turns into Existential Crisis Wednesday.
What is the gut–brain axis (enteric nervous system)?
This outdated “science” involved reading personality from bumps on the skull — making every 1800s bad hair day feel like a diagnosis.
What is phrenology?
Many fans argue that this Winnie the Pooh character is basically a walking DSM entry for depression — making his catchphrase, “Thanks for noticing me,” the saddest mic drop in children’s literature.
Who is Eeyore?
These are the emotional tightropes DBT therapists talk about — like balancing “I want independence” with “please take care of me,” or “I hate you” with “don’t leave me.” It’s basically emotional yoga
What are dialectical dilemmas?
This concept reminds you that you’re the sky, not the weather — so when your mind storms with anxious thoughts, you don’t have to grab an umbrella every five minutes.
What is self-as-context (the observing self)?