BRAD BIO
This Philadelphia-adjacent town shaped Brad into the man who once kicked a drowning rat.
What is Bala Cynwyd?
Brad’s ideal bagel order: a plain bagel with
What is onion?
Brad has never had a meal plan, yet he still finds a way to raid this campus dining hall for junk food at all hours.
What is JJ’s?
This MLB team brings Brad joy, pain, and personality formation.
Who are the Phillies?
This is Brad’s favorite color — shockingly, not related to the Phillies.
What is blue?
Brad’s Hebrew name, shared with a biblical judge and spelled like a Scrabble mistake.
What is Ephraim (Effie)?
Despite hating tomatoes everywhere else, he believes they’re elite only in this state.
What is New Jersey?
Brad got all his friends curious about this unusual combo of two drinks that somehow became a favorite.
What is a pickleback shot?
This NFL team is Brad’s emotional support system.
Who are the Eagles?
Brad mysteriously kept this item from our very first date.
What is a Serafina takeout bag?
Brad’s middle name sounds like something you might do to a puppy or a child.
What is Foster?
These two baked goods form the best duo of Brad’s dessert loyalty.
What are banana bread and blueberry pie from Cookies?
Brad introduced this funny tradition, named after a former U.S. president, which involved launching unsuspecting people into shrubbery.
What is ‘George Bushing’?
Brad enjoys watching this global motorsport where cars go very fast and the fanbases fight online.
What is Formula 1?
Brad believes this Philadelphia sandwich shop is his favorite.
What is John’s Roast Pork?
Name three of Brad’s pets, past or present.
What are Gremlin (RIP), Gizmo, Appa, Babu, Bodie, or Biggie?
Brad’s preferred bread when he’s feeling cultured and deli-adjacent.
What is rye bread?
Brad was infamous for microwaving this unkosher dish in the JTS residence hall microwaves.
What is chicken parmesan?
Aquatic Brad is known for excellence in this stand-up water sport.
What is paddle boarding/surfing?
The camp responsible for half Brad’s personality traits.
What is Nockamixon?
The birthday boy comes from a family so committed to alphabetical consistency that all five siblings share this first letter.
What is “B” — Ben, Blake, Brad, Bella, Brielle?
When consuming alcohol, Brad is statistically 85% more likely to order THIS drink than any other.
What is vodka soda with lime?
Brad once claimed he attended this prestigious-sounding, completely fictional university after one too many drinks.
What is Sweet Potato University (SPU)?
At camp, Brad did this dangerous event which involves fire, coaching, yelling, swim caps, and goggles.
What is rope burn?
Brad can spout detailed facts about these underwater ecosystems and the creatures that live in them.
What are coral reefs?