Boundary Boss
What is a boundary?
A limit that helps you communicate what you're comfortable with
Your best friend makes a new friend and starts spending more time with them. You feel left out. What's the healthiest response?
Share how you're feeling without making them feel guilty for having other friends.
Why: It's normal to feel left out sometimes. Healthy friendships allow people to have other friends, and honest communication can help
Someone repeatedly makes fun of your appearance and says, “I'm just being honest.” Is that an excuse?
No. Honesty doesn't excuse cruelty or disrespect.
Is it selfish to say no when you don't have the time or energy to help someone?
No. You can care about others while taking care of yourself.
What does consent mean?
Freely agreeing to something without pressure, guilt, or force.
Your friend says, “If you were really my bestie, you'd tell me your secret.” Is this a healthy way to ask?
No. Friendship shouldn't require pressure or guilt.
Your friend tells you a secret about another girl and asks you not to tell anyone. Later, you learn that the secret is being spread around school. What is the best response?
Avoid spreading the information, support the person being targeted, and seek help from a trusted adult if needed.
Why:Loyalty doesn't mean keeping harmful behavior a secret or spreading private information. You can protect someone's privacy while still getting help when someone is being hurt.
Your friend demands an immediate response to every text and gets angry if you take an hour to reply. What could this signal?
Entitlement to your time and an attempt to control your attention.
You post a picture you're excited about, but it gets very few likes. You start wondering if you're not pretty or interesting enough. What's the healthiest thing to remember?
Likes don't measure your value, and social media doesn't show the whole picture of someone's life.
Someone says yes because they're afraid their partner will break up with them if they say no. Is that a healthy situation?
No. Using threats of rejection or emotional pressure to obtain agreement is not respectful consent.
Your friend keeps asking you to share your phone password, even after you say no. What kind of boundary is this?
Privacy / Digital
You're in a group chat where your friends are making fun of a girl from your grade. One friend messages you privately and says, "Don't be boring. Everyone is doing it!" What is the strongest response?
Refuse to participate, avoid sharing the messages, and consider checking on the girl or getting adult support if the bullying continues.
Someone shares a screenshot of your private conversation to embarrass you, then says everyone does it. What's the red flag?
Violating your privacy and dismissing the harm caused.
Someone compliments you only when you do what they want. What should you consider?
Affection and respect shouldn't be used as rewards for compliance.
Someone keeps asking you to do something after you've already said no. Eventually, you say yes just to get them to stop asking. Is that freely given consent?
No, because repeated pressure can make it difficult to freely choose.
Your friends post a picture of you that you don't like. What boundary could you communicate?
Ask them to take it down and not post pictures of you without checking first.
You notice that one friend only talks to you when they need homework answers, a favor, or someone to vent to. When you need support, they're suddenly unavailable. What is the healthiest next step?
Talk to your friend about the pattern, communicate what you need, and consider creating some distance if nothing changes.
A person apologizes after yelling at you but repeatedly does the same thing. What should you pay attention to?
The repeated behavior, not just the apology.
Your friends all want to do something that makes you uncomfortable. You say no, and they call you boring. What does standing in your worth look like?
Staying true to your limits, even when others disagree.
Your friends dare you to hug or kiss someone to prove you're not scared. What should you remember?
Peer pressure doesn't replace consent. Everyone involved must freely agree.
Someone respects your boundary but seems disappointed. Does that mean your boundary was wrong?
For example: Your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to move your relationship to the next level, but you are not ready so you communicate that and they are sad/disappointed.
No. Someone can feel disappointed and still respect your decision.
Your best friend has been making hurtful comments about another girl. When you speak up, your friend says, "Wow, I thought you were supposed to be on MY side!" What is the healthiest way to respond?
Explain that you care about your friendship but won't support behavior that hurts others, and encourage your friend to make a different choice.
Your partner asks you to stop wearing certain clothes because they say other people will look at you. What's concerning?
Trying to control your clothing or appearance.
What's the difference between confidence and thinking you're better than everyone else?
Confidence recognizes your own value without needing to put others down.
Name three ways you can show someone you respect their consent
Possible answers:
Ask before touching someone or borrowing their belongings.
Accept “no” without arguing or pressuring.
Check in if someone seems uncomfortable.
Ask before sharing someone's photo or private information.
Understand that someone can change their mind.
Never assume that a relationship means automatic permission.