Fact, feeling, thought
You scored 7 out of 10 on your spelling test. What is this: fact, feeling, or thought?
Fact — it is something that can be verified.
Your brain says, “I can't do this!” when you get a difficult math problem. What are two things you could tell yourself instead?
I can try one step at a time” and “I can ask for help if I get stuck.”
You are telling a friend an exciting story, but they keep looking at the door and checking the clock. What could you do to figure out whether they are still interested?
Notice social cues: Pause, ask if they want to keep listening, or give them a chance to talk.
What is one thing you can do to help your body calm down when you're feeling really angry?
Take slow breaths, count slowly, take a break, or use another safe calming strategy
You notice your teacher looks serious while handing back your test. You immediately decide you must have done badly, even before looking at your grade
Jumping Jack
Your friend plays with someone else at recess, and you feel left out. What is “I feel left out”?
Feeling — it describes an emotional experience.
You feel angry because your friend broke a rule during a game. Can you be angry and still choose to act kindly? Explain how.
Yes! Feelings and actions are different. You can feel angry and calmly explain what bothered you.
Two friends want you to play different games at recess. Both say their game is the best and refuse to change their minds. How could you help everyone find a solution?
Compromise: Take turns choosing, combine the games if possible, or agree on a fair plan.
Can you feel two emotions at the same time? Give an example.
Yes! You can feel excited about a new school and nervous about making friends.
Your friend says, “Okay,” instead of their usual enthusiastic “YES!” You become convinced they secretly don't want to play with you.
Psychic Susan
Your teacher doesn't smile at you this morning, and you think, “She must be upset with me.” What is “She must be upset with me”?
Thought — it is an interpretation, not a confirmed fact.
You think your classmates are laughing at you, but you haven't checked why they're laughing. What are three other possible explanations?
They could be laughing at a joke, something else that happened, or a funny story someone told.
You tell a joke, and everyone laughs except one friend, who looks uncomfortable. You think it was funny, so you don't understand why they are upset. What should you do?
Perspective-taking and empathy: Check in with the child, listen to their feelings, and apologize if the joke hurt them.
Your brain tells you, “I can't do this!” when you face a difficult puzzle. What could you say back to your brain?
I can try one step at a time,” or “I don't know how yet, but I can learn.”
You win three rounds of a game and lose the fourth. When someone asks how you did, you say, “Terribly! I couldn't even win every round.”
Negative Nancy/ disaster Dan
You lose a board game and think, “I'm terrible at everything.” Identify the fact, the feeling, and the thought.
Fact: You lost the game. Feeling: Perhaps disappointment or frustration. Thought: “I'm terrible at everything.”
You tried deep breathing to calm down, but you're still upset. Does that mean the coping skill failed? What could you try next?
No. One strategy may not be enough. You could take a break, move your body, talk to a trusted adult, or try another coping skill.
Your friend tells you a secret about being scared of something. Later, other children ask you what the secret was because they promise not to tell anyone else. What should you do, and why?
Trust and boundaries: Keep the confidence unless someone may be in danger; if safety is a concern, tell a trusted adult.
What is the difference between being kind and letting someone do whatever they want to you?
You can be kind while still having boundaries, saying no, and asking for help.
You have to perform in a school play. You think, “If I forget one line, the whole play will be ruined, everyone will laugh, and I'll never want to perform again.”
Your friend doesn't invite you to a party. You feel sad and think, “Nobody really likes me.” Which part do you know for sure, which part is a feeling, and which part is an assumption?
Fact: You weren't invited. Feeling: Sadness. Thought/assumption: “Nobody really likes me.” Not being invited doesn't prove that nobody likes you.
Two children get the same disappointing result. One says, “I'm a failure,” while the other says, “I didn't succeed this time, but I can learn.” What is different about their thinking, and which thought is more helpful?
The first labels the whole self based on one result. The second separates the outcome from personal worth and leaves room to improve.
Your friend has been playing with someone new all week. When you ask to join, they say, “Maybe later.” You feel left out and want to tell them they're a terrible friend. What are two ways you could respond that protect your feelings without starting a fight?
Assertive communication and emotional regulation: Say, “I feel left out. Can we plan to play together later?” or find another activity while managing the disappointment.
You tried three ways to solve a problem, and none worked. Does that mean you failed? What could you do next?
No. You can learn from what didn't work, try a different strategy, or ask for help.
Your friend doesn't choose you as their partner one time. You think, “They chose someone else, so our friendship must be falling apart, and soon nobody will want to play with me.”
Jumping Jack/with Disaster Dan/psychic Susan