Pause & Think!
What is an impulse?
A sudden urge or feeling that makes you want to do something right away without thinking it through.
What does it mean to think before you act?
Stop and consider what might happen before making a decision.
What does empathy mean?
Understanding or considering how another person might feel.
What is one way you can tell if someone might be uncomfortable during a conversation?
They might stop talking, move away, look upset, or ask you to stop.
If you hurt someone's feelings, even by accident, what is 1 thing you can do to make things better?
Apologize sincerely and take responsibility instead of being defensive.
What might an impulse feeling like in your body or mind?
Feeling like you HAVE to say or do something immediately, feeling excited, restless, angry, frustrated, or having trouble waiting.
What is 1 strategy you can use when you feel like blurting something out?
Count to 10, take a pause or deep breath, wait for an appropriate time to speak.
Your friend makes a mistake during a game and you call them stupid. How might your friend feel?
Embarrassed, hurt, frustrated, upset, sad.
Your teacher is explaining directions to a classmate but you need help on a question. What is the appropriate way to get your teacher's attention?
Raise your hand and wait for your teacher to call on you.
What does taking responsibility for your actions mean?
Acknowledging what you did and recognizing your role without blaming someone else.
Name 2 situations at school when you might experience an impulse.
What you want to make classmates laugh or get attention during class; when you feel frustrated or competitive during a game.
You're getting frustrated because you're losing a game. What are 2 things you can do to avoid reacting impulsively?
Take a breath, count to 10, remind yourself it's just a game, step away.
Your friends start making fun of another student. You join in because everyone else is laughing. How do you think your actions impact the student?
The student could feel embarrassed or sad. Other people might not want to be friends with the student. The student might get bullied more. The student might not want to come to school anymore.
A friend says, "Stop joking about that." You think it's funny and want to continue. What should you do?
Stop joking, respect their request, talk about something else, apologize, offer to change your behavior ("next time I won't joke about that").
You interrupt your teacher while they are teaching or helping your classmates. What could you say to take responsibility?
"I'm sorry for interrupting, I'll wait my turn".
You're playing an intense game of basketball. The other team is winning and your teammate keeps passing the ball to other people. You feel an urge to blame your teammate and you want to yell at them. What should you do before acting?
Pause, recognize the impulse, think about the consequences, and count to 10 before deciding what to do. You can also take a deep breath to calm your body and mind before making a decision.
You're tempted to make a joke about a classmate because you know your friends will laugh. What are 2 consequences you should consider before saying it?
The classmate might feel embarrassed or hurt, your friends might join in, you could damage your friendship with the classmate, you could get in trouble.
You make a joke about someone's answer in class. Everyone laughs except the student you joked about. Why might the student feel differently from everyone else?
The student is the target of the joke and may feel singled out, upset, or embarrassed, rather than entertained by your joke.
You and your teammate are losing a game and your teammate starts to feel frustrated. They start yelling at you and calling you names. You feel upset, angry, and nervous. What is an appropriate response?
Recognize they're frustrated, give them space, walk away, tell a teacher.
You join your friends in making fun of another student. You realize afterward that you hurt the student's feelings. What are 3 things you can do to make it right?
Apologize, offer to change your behavior, offer support, acknowledge the student's feelings.
A classmate keeps making noises while you're trying to work. You yell at them, "SHUT UP!" What might you do next time instead?
Recognize the impulse to yell, take a deep breath, ask the student to stop respectfully, ask the teacher for help, think about how yelling might make them feel or how you might feel if someone said that to you.
You're playing a game with friends. Someone makes a mistake, and you feel the urge to yell at them. You know you might say something hurtful. Describe what you should do instead.
Recognize the impulse, consider the consequences, leave the situation temporarily until you're calm. Return when calm and communicate respectfully.
Your friend makes an inappropriate comment about another student. You laugh and repeat the comment. The student looks down and stops talking. You weren't the person who started it. Explain why you still played a role in hurting this student.
By laughing and repeating it, I encouraged the behavior and made it worse. Instead of standing up for the classmate or telling an adult, I chose to participate in it. The student may feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.
You accidently knock someone's materials off their desk. You immediately say, "Well you shouldn't have put them there!" What was inappropriate about your response? How could you take responsibility?
I blamed the other person instead of acknowledging my actions. I could say, "I'm sorry I knocked your things over. I'll help pick them up."
You lose a basketball game and you yell at your teammate, "it's your fault we lost!" You realize your reaction hurt their feelings. Give a complete response that demonstrates empathy, taking responsibility, and a plan for changing your behavior.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you. It's not okay that I said that and I realize I made you feel bad when we were just trying to play. I shouldn't have taken my frustration out on you. Next time, I'll take a break if I'm getting too upset."