Definitions
An emotional conflict in which the parties are trying to show that the other person is wrong
What is a quarrel, argument or fight?
Finding ways to justify bad behavior
What is minimizing or excuse making?
You’re not responsible for the results of your actions; blame others and feel the rules don't apply to you; "poor me"
What is Victim Stance?
Wanting people to like and include you
What is acceptance?
Displaying kindness for others
What is caring?
the urge to prefer right over wrong or an inner feeling or voice that acts as a guide to the right or wrong behavior
What is a conscience?
Black and white thinking; thinking in extremes; everything is all bad or all good
What is all or nothing thinking or universals?
You focus on the other person as the source of the problem, when you may have had some part in it.
What is blaming others?
Staying firm in your friendship or support for someone or something
What is Loyalty?
Impartial and just treatment or behavior without favoritism or discrimination
What is fairness?
An individual's accepted standards of right or wrong
What are values?
We believe we know what others are thinking and assume that they are thinking the worst of us
What is mind reading?
We predict that things will turn out badly (having an imaginary crystal ball that tells us about our future in a negative way)
What is Fortune Telling?
Doing the right thing when no one is watching
What is integrity or character?
The ability to keep promises, be honest, reliable and principled without betraying a confidence
What is trust or trustworthiness?
Things we tell ourselves to make doing the wrong thing okay
What is a thinking error?
A thinking error (two words) that put unreasonable demands and pressure on ourselves, which can make us feel guilty or like we've failed.
What is should or ought?
Taking our emotions as evidence for the truth; whatever you’re feeling at the time is believed to be true automatically and unconditionally, regardless of the evidence
What is Feelings vs. Facts or Emotional Reasoning?
Being dependable, making good choices, and taking accountability for your actions
What is responsibility?
Noticing and appreciating the things we take for granted
What is gratitude?
Society's standards of right and wrong
What are morals?
What are only, but and just?
A person exaggerates the negative consequences of a current situation; makes a "mountain out of a molehill"
What is catastrophizing or making little problems big?
Telling the truth
What is honesty?
Putting yourself in someone else's shoes
What is empathy?