You say fútbol, I say soccer
According to the FIFA rulebook, a player is in this position if: He is nearer to his opponents' goal line than both the ball and the second to last opponent.
What is offsides?
In medical nomenclature, this is the name of the upper arm bone which leads to the funny bone
What is the humerus?
This is the number of concussions Lauren has suffered in her lifetime
What is 4?
In sailing terms, the righthand side of a boat is referred to as this
What is starboard?
This term is defined as: A word that blends the sounds and combines the meanings of two other words
(for example "brunch" – from 'breakfast' and 'lunch')
What is a “portmanteau”?
This soccer configuration includes a double sweeper format and a right back and left back defender (hint: "____ back four")
What is a flat back four?
This muscle in the posterior upper body, located between the neck and the shoulder, is famously pointed out by veteran commander, Admiral Ackbar
What is "trap" or trapezius muscle?
(It's a trap!)
This childhood toy is one that Lauren and her sister Bethany always wanted but never received. Although they hold no grievances about it, they like to pretend that they do, just to torment their mother with a lifetime of regret.
This toy was popular in the 1990s. It allowed children to bake real cakes like grown ups, but with a smaller, safer apparatus.
What is an Easy Bake Oven?
The actual sails on a sailboat are technically referred to as this (hint: three ____ to the wind)
What is sheets?
This individual founded the city where Lauren grew up. (Hint: it is one of the following names)
1) Sir Walter Raleigh
2) Sir Clement Henry
3) Sir Gilbert Raleigh
4) Sir Sweet Tea himself
Who is Sir Walter Raleigh? (#1)
This type of free kick is distinguished by the following rule:
A goal can be scored only if the ball touched another player before it enters the goal (once the kick is made)
What is an Indirect Kick?
This sea animal's brain looks a whole lot like the female reproductive system
What is a shark?
What college class did Lauren receive an "E" grade in at the end of the semester? (hint: a certain type of writing)
What is Creative Writing?
(for failing to turn in several papers. Oops)
This maneuver is performed when a sailing vessel turns its bow toward the wind so that wind blows to push the boat into a new direction
What is tacking?
This famous basketball player grew up in North Carolina and played for University of Kentucky
Who is John Wall?
This professional men’s soccer team had Lauren’s favorite soccer player, Iker Casillas, on its roster from 1999-2015
What is Real Madrid?
Adhesive Capsulitis is most commonly referred to in layman's term as this condition, which is not so funny
What is Frozen Shoulder?
This is a type of music ensemble that Lauren got cut from in high school, which forever harmed her confidence in the ability to perform this activity
What is Chorale? (an exclusive, competition choral group, smaller in size than the high school "Chorus")
An emergency procedure word used internationally as a distress signal in voice radio communications
What is mayday?
This mountain, in western North Carolina, is known for its rocky silhouette – which looks like the profile of an old man
What is Grandfather Mountain?
She is famous female soccer player (from Mia Hamm's era) who is tall, curly haired, Christian, and published a book in 2000 called The Game and The Glory
Who is Michelle Akers?
(I read her entire book, back when I was an excellent reader)
This lobe of the brain is responsible for reasoning/determining whether a joke is actually funny or rather just inappropriate and better left unsaid
What is the frontal lobe?
In this college class (mathematics related), Lauren was found sleeping in her desk, during the middle of an exam
What is Pre-Calculus?
Funny story: Lauren had already passed Calculus in high school, but Cedarville did not recognize her AP credit. When Lauren transferred to UK, she immediately received full credit in Calculus (due to the passing score on her AP exam), and her sleeping days were merely a function of a dream, approaching infinity but never reaching it
The name for the long handled steering device on a sailboat (not a "wheel")
What is a rudder?
This one item does not belong amongst the following industries established in North Carolina:
Krispy Kreme, Pepsi Cola, Nestlé, Texas Pete, Vick's VaporRub, and Cheerwine
What is Nestlé?