All about Thinking Traps!
What distortion is it called when we predict only the worst outcomes of an event or situation? For example: "I'm going to go to the party and not know anyone and be super awkward"
Catastrophizing! (Seeing only the worst outcomes)
What is it called when we pay attention to only the negative aspects of a situation and ignore any positive aspects?
Disqualifying the positive.
How do we reframe magnification/minimizing?
Distorted Thought: "I messed up my presentation -- it was a total disaster!"
Hint: What went well?
“It didn’t go perfectly, but I did some parts really well. Everyone makes mistakes when they’re nervous.”
DOUBLE JEOPARDY:
1. Identify what distortion is occurring
2. Challenge it
"I'm going to my friends birthday party and I don't know anyone. I'm going to be so awkward and not talk to anyone".
1. Catastrophizing This person is thinking of the worst case scenario.
2. What positive outcomes could happen? Could make friends and have fun.
Jenna and Elyse got in a fight a few months ago. While they were fighting, Jenna did not reply to any of Elyse's texts. They've since resolved their differences and are friends again! However, Elyse has noticed she's been feeling worried when her friends do not respond to her texts since the fight with Jenna -- she thinks that every time someone doesn't respond, they are mad at her.
What thinking trap is Elyse stuck in? What advice would you give to Elyse?
Hint: O......G......
Overgeneralizing
Advice:
1. Are people ALWAYS mad when they don't respond to texts?
2. What other reasons might friends have for not responding?
What word do you notice in the following statements:
"I should always be best dressed"
"I should always look good in photos"
"I shouldn't need help on my math problems in class"
SHOULD! "Should thinking" is a thinking trap where we develop rules for how ourselves or others should act, respond, feel, or even look!
This distortion happens when we don't believe our own achievements are important. For example: "I got a question right in class when I was called on but I stuttered when I answered it"
Hint: Zooming in and Out
Minimizing! We often minimize our accomplishments and focus on the negative vs the positive.
Reframe the catastrophic thought:
"If I answer the question wrong, everyone will think that I'm stupid".
Hint: Ask yourself, (1) what's the worst thing that could happen? AND (2) what is the likelihood that this will actually happen? THEN what?
"I might feel stupid for getting a question wrong, but I'll learn the answer in a minute. My classmates might think about this for 2 minutes, maxiumum".
Challenge a thought of disqualifying the positive:
"They said I looked nice, but they were just being polite"
Gather evidence: can compliments be accepted as truth?
Self talk: Can I believe positive things about myself?
You post a photo on social media -- nobody comments on it. You think "nobody likes me, I must be boring".
1. What cognitive distortion is at work here?
Personalization, Mind Reading
What could we replace this thought with?
Taking an outcome from one event, and applying it to ALL future events is an example of....
Over generalizing! For example, "I was so awkward at my last job interview, so I KNOW I'll be so awkward at the next one".
This distortion happens when we make something (like a mistake, error, or perceived flaw) MORE important than it actually is.
Hint: Zooming In and out
Magnification! Ex: I got one pimple today and my face looks disgusting.
Challenge the distorted thought (an overgeneralization):
"I'm always so awkward"
Hint: What evidence do you have for and against this thought?
"I've had fun conversations before and awkward conversations before, but they don't mean I'm an awkward person".
This is a hard one:
You feel really nervous before giving a presentation. You think to yourself, "I'm really nervous right now and I'm going to mess up".
How could you challenge this?
Hint: Look at someone else in the same situation. How do you think they feel?
Perspective taking and self compassion!
"Everyone feels nervous before presenting, and its normal that I do to!"
Jessie doesn't usually study for math, but this time felt motivated and studied hard. Jessie got her grade back and thought, "I am just terrible at math and I will never get better".
How might this thought impact Jessie in the future? Is it helpful, or unhelpful?
Jessie might be caught in all or nothing thinking -- labeling herself as "terrible" without recognizing the positive effort she applied to this situation (studying and trying her best). Overgeneralizing might cause Jessie to think that even with studying, her efforts are useless and won't improve outcome.
Replacement: "I worked hard this time, and even though I didn’t get the grade I wanted, I’m learning and can keep improving.”
True or False: Our feelings always tell us the truth. Ex: If embarrassed doing something, it means everyone is judging me.
False! This is called emotional reasoning -- when we feel a certain way about a situation (anxious, nervous, etc), we often think of reasons why we feel that way (people are judging, something bad will happen, etc).
This distortion happens when we believe we are responsible for events outside of our control. For example: My teacher is always grumpy when she talks to me, probably because I am a bad student.
Personalizing! In this example, we are taking our teacher's grumpiness personally and assuming we are to blame.
De-personalize this distorted thought pattern:
"My friend didn't text me back, they must be mad at me".
Hint: Think of at least 2 other alternative solutions.
"Maybe they're sleeping or busy right now" ....
"I was quiet at the party, so I'm bad at making friends".
Overgeneralizing! One situation doesn't mean I failed.
Reframe: "I was shy today but..."
Ask Ms. Grace a question :)
:) :) :) :) :) :)
What do you think "All or Nothing" thinking is?
Thinking in absolutes! Ex "I am always so awkward around new people", or "I never get treated fairly".
What does "jumping to conclusions" mean?
When we make a conclusion about an event with little to no evidence!
Two Types:
1. Mind Reading (assuming): "My teacher didn't smile at me, so she probably hates me".
2. Fortune Telling (Predicting before it happens): "If I text Jamie I know they won't respond"
Challenge the distorted thought: Jumping to Conclusions
"I heard my classmates laughing and I know it's about me".
Hint: What evidence do you have to support they're laughing at you? Why else could they be laughing?
.....
'I'm always so awkward and weird at parties".
1. Find evidence.
2. Replace "always" with a gray area word (sometimes, occasionally)
3. What would you say to a friend who said this to you?
...
DOUBLE! Give me an example of your own thinking traps and replace it.
:) hehe!