What do Lawyers wear when they go to court?
Law-Suits
What do you call a pig that does Karate
Pork Chop
The more you have of it, the less you see
darkness
What turns everything around but does not move?
a MIRROR
What can’t talk on its own but will reply when spoken to?
An echo
What is never hungry during Thanksgiving?
a stuffed turkey
Why did the soccer ball quit.
Because he was kicked around
When I take five and add six, I get eleven, but when I take six and add seven, I get one. What am I?
a CLOCK
Where does today come before yesterday?
The dictionary
If you have me you want to share me, if you share me you won't have me. What am I?
A SECRET
Why did the grandma put wheels on her rocking chair?
she likes to rock and roll
What word can you add letters to make it shorter?
Short
What did one stop light stay to the other stop light
Stop looking, I am changing
What belongs to you but other people use it more than you do?
YOUR NAME
What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?
The future
What do the numbers 11, 69, 88, and 96 all have in common?
They are all read the same upside down
Why was Zero jealous of Eight?
Because he was wearing a designer belt.
A word I know, six letters it contains. Subtract just one, and twelve is what remains.
dozens
What is harder to catch the faster you run?
YOUR BREATH
I'm tall when I'm young and short when I'm old. What am I?
A CANDLE
What gives you ability to walk through walls?
DOORS
Those who have it least don't know that they have it. Those who have it most wish they had less of it, but not too little or none at all. What is it?
AGE
Which is faster? Hot or Cold?
Hot is faster, because you can catch a cold.
What word is always pronounced wrong?
WRONG
I start with M, end with X, and I have any number of letters in me. What am I?
a MAILBOX?