Whole Body Listening &
Ignoring Distractions
Ignoring Distractions
Why is using WBL important?
Demonstrating Whole Body Listening (WBL) shows our friends that we are interested and care about what they are saying, and people want to be friends with others who listen and have a calm body.
Why is it important to take someone else’s perspective?
It helps us get to know people, allows us to have discussions, helps us learn, and helps us to get along with others, etc.
What does it mean to be flexible?
Being flexible means thinking about more than one solution, thinking about others, being okay if your plans change, keeping an open mind, and trying new things
What are the four colors on the mood meter? List a feeling that matches each color.
Red feelings: High in energy and more unpleasant (e.g., angry, scared, and anxious)
Blue feelings: Low in energy and more unpleasant (e.g., sad, disappointed, and lonely)
Green feelings: Low in energy and more pleasant (e.g., calm, tranquil, and relaxed)
Yellow feelings: High in energy and more pleasant (e.g., happy, excited, and curious)
Why is it important to think about the size of our problem?
It is important to identify the size of the problem so you know what size your reaction should be. For example, your reaction to a small problem should be small (using problem solving steps to figure it out on your own). It’s important to think about how others may feel if you react to a small problem as if it’s a big problem.
If someone has a big reaction (ex: screaming , kicking) to a small problem it makes others feel (confused/ uncomfortable).
Name 3 body parts we use for WBL. How do we use each one?
Eyes- look at the person talking to you
Ears- both ears ready to hear
Mouth- quiet (no talking, humming or making sounds)
Hands- quiet in lap, pockets, or by your side
Feet- quiet on the floor
Body- faces the speaker
Brain- thinking about what is being said
Heart caring about what the other person is saying
What are the three steps to seeing someone else's side?
Step 1: Stop and think about what happened and how YOU feel (I.e., I’m angry she bumped into me)
Step 2: Stop and think about what happened and how the OTHER PERSON may feel (i.e., she is frowning; she looks like she feels bad about bumping into me)
Step 3: Think about WHY they may have done what they did and any background information you know about this person (i.e., She is my friend, and she looks like she feels bad, she must have bumped into me by accident).
What does it mean to be "rigid" or "stuck"?
Being rigid or stuck means you are unable to change and are “stuck.” This happens when you get upset if things do not your way instead of trying to solve the problem, or instead of thinking about other solutions. Being rigid means we do not try to think about others’ thoughts and feelings.
How can we use our self-controller scanner to stay in control if we feel a strong or uncomfortable emotion?
Self-Controller Scanner helps us to be more aware of how we are feeling and think of strategies we can use if we feel like we’re losing control
The same strategy isn’t going to be the best to use every time
You can think of more than one strategy and pick the best one for right now
Ex: take deep breaths, squeeze your hands together, get a snack, ask for a break, count to 10, etc.
To help you figure out the best strategy for different moments, use the Self-Controller Scanner
How are small and big problems different? What questions can we ask to figure out the size of our problem?
“Small” problems - You can calm down and solve the problem by yourself, and there is no danger involved.
Examples: When you lose in a game, when you get upset that you are not first in line, when a friend wants to play a different game than you, when you forget your toy to share at Social City, when the flavor you wanted to get at the ice cream store is sold out, when you wanted to go to the park but it’s raining.
“Big” problems - It lasts a long time, you may need the help of an adult, and there may be danger involved.
Examples: A bully at school that teases a lot of students, a student falls and badly hurts themselves, there’s a fire in the building, you hit your head on the playground.
Identify and describe the problem- Is it small or big?
Can you solve it by yourself?
Does it last a long time?
Is anybody hurt?
What does "Brain Eater" do to our brains when we are trying to listen?
Makes you get stuck thinking about your favorite topic
Show videos or pictures in your head that are fun to think about, even though other are trying to talk to you or it is learning time
Say things that are off-topic
Focus on touching or playing with things that are around you
What are the three things we can learn from losing a game?
1. Self-control- we can keep our bodies calm and not cry or yell. We can use a calm voice and keep mean thoughts in our heads. When we have self-control our friends will have good thoughts about us and want to continue playing with us.
2. Stick with it- we can keep trying even when things get hard and don’t give up! Each time we play a game, even if we don’t win, we get better and better at the game!
3. Be a better friend- people will enjoy playing with us if we are kind winners and losers. This shows that we are being a good sport! We should treat our friends the way that we would want to be treated (for example, saying “good game” at the end even if you didn’t win, or complimenting your friend by saying “nice move”). When we do this, our friends will do the same for us.
Name two strategies we can use to help us be flexible thinkers.
1) Think of ideas: Being flexible starts with understanding there are choices, options, and different ways to look at a situation. We can be flexible when we see we have choices. (e.g., I like vehicles so I can play with trains, cars, or trucks)
2) Add Ideas Together: Sometimes being flexible means compromising with others. Since the word, “compromise” is a hard to define abstract concept, we teach our young students through more concrete language. The strategy is that we want them to “add their ideas together.” (e.g., I want to play with trucks and my friend wants to play with blocks so we play with both together)
3) Let it go: Sometimes being flexible means giving up your idea or plan. When we teach the strategy of “let it go” we help students visualize an idea floating away like a balloon in a sky. We pair this concept with a physical gesture. As you say, “let it go,” touch your fingertips of one hand together and place them up on your head. Then lift your hand open as it floats up away from your head. Use this gesture in real time across environments to help affirm this concept.
4) Try another way: Many times our students come up with one way to do something and then stick to that plan. This can be a tremendous challenge when that one way doesn’t work out , or that one solution does not make the problem smaller or solve it. Part of being a flexible thinker is recognizing when we are stuck or when a barrier is preventing us from being able to stop, change our plan and try another way.
What can you do to figure out if when you are losing control?
Scan your brain and body to figure out when you are losing control
Brain scan: Am I paying attention? Do I know what everyone is talking about?
Body scan: How am I feeling? Do I feel calm and neutral or am I feeling a bigger emotion?
Why should we advocate for ourselves?
When we advocate for ourselves, it lets other people know what we are thinking and how we are feeling.
When others know what we are thinking and how we are feeling, they can change how they are acting so they can be more helpful and less hurtful.
Think about the topic
Ask yourself “What is everyone thinking about and talking about right now?”
Move your body away from other kids that are distracting you
Move objects away from you so you are not thinking about playing with them
Give two "good sport" behaviors and two "bad sport" behaviors.
answers will vary
Why is it important to be flexible?
Being flexible is an important skill to have to build and maintain friendships because others will have good thoughts about you. Being flexible shows you are thinking about others.
When we are flexible, others have good thoughts about us and will want to play with us. When we are rigid, others may not want to play with us.
Pick a strategy you can use to get back in control. What steps do you need to take to get what you need?
(answers will vary)
Do I need a break?
Am I hungry or thirsty? Do I need a snack?
What physical actions will help me calm down? Do I need to take deep breaths? Take a break? Use positive self-talk? Count to 10? Or something else?
You may need to try more than one strategy or you might need to talk to an adult or ask for help.
What are the three steps to self-advocacy?
We talk to someone about our needs
Example: I need to take a break from this activity
We tell them the reason for our needs
Example: I am getting frustrated with a situation and I’m afraid I will have a reaction that is too big
We make sure we get what we need
Example: I go get a drink from the water fountain with permission from my teacher