Tips for Young Adult Dating
What is called when people gather and have more fun together and there is safety in numbers?
Going on group dates!
What types of activity do you need consent for?
For anything that involves some form of contact with another person; verbal and/or physical. Example: any physical contact beyond typical social boundaries including touching, kissing, hugging, etc.
Your partner suddenly breaks up with you. Does this mean that you’re unlovable? Of course not! It may hurt, but this is just not the right relationship for you.
What are some things you could do for yourself?
Allow Yourself to Feel-It’s okay to feel hurt, disappointed, or even angry. Give yourself time to process these emotions.
Focus on self-care
Reconnect with friends and family
What are the 4 Ws plus an H to consider when planning a date?
Who, What, When, Where, How?
Name three dating apps a person can use to date and/or hook up
Example: Tinder, Bumble, Hinge
What is it called when you allow your partner to have personal space and allow time?
You are respecting boundaries!
What do you do when someone blocks you or stops responding to you?
Respect boundaries, do not continue to message them or try to find ways to contact them.
This is a signal they don't want communication to occur.
Do be specific when asking someone for a date. Just asking if they want to “get together” or “hang out” may not result in a date. Ask for a specific kind of date and set up a specific day and time. For instance, “Would you like to go to Pizza Hut this weekend?” If they say yes, ask if you can pick them up on Sunday at 6:00.
Now it’s your turn. Practice asking someone out for a date. Be specific.
Example: "Hey Nick, I was wondering if you’d like to go to Cheesecake Factory with me this Saturday at 5:30. I’ve heard they have great food, and I think it would be fun to go on a date together! Would you like me to pick you up?"
What does good hygiene mean?
Shower, grooming, clean clothes, clean teeth, etc.
What is it called when there is something that you specifically don't like
red flag
What is it called when you and/or your partner are telling each other how you feel even when its bad?
Good Communication
What is one thing you can say or one action you can take if there is someone who is indicating they are interested in you and you do not feel the same way.
"I'm not interested"
"no"
"I'd like to be friends"
walk away
log off
call for support
Think about the possibility of physical contact. Know where you stand on this ahead of time. Talking to a trusted adult about this beforehand is a good idea.
Don’t feel pressured to do anything you don’t want to do or that you believe is wrong. Be prepared to make it clear to the other person where you stand. Take steps to end the date if the other person does not respect your decision.
What will you say?
“I’m really enjoying our time together, but I’m just not comfortable with that level of physical contact.”
“I want to take things slow and keep it respectful. This is what feels right for me, and I hope you can understand that.”
“I don’t think this is working out for me, and I’d like to go home now.”
How do you confirm if a date is still going to happen?
Message/Talk to them 1-2 days before the date to confirm
Both people have to want to do this in a relationship, to make a relationship work.
Put in the Work
What is it called when each person gives up a little bit of what they want until both people agree?
Compromise
Do listen to that little voice that may caution you not to do something. That voice is often right. You can say no to anything you don’t feel comfortable or safe doing, and you don’t have to give your reasoning. Sometimes, saying no can be uncomfortable, but muster the courage to say it anyway.
Why is this important?
Self-Protection
Personal Boundaries
If you ignore your instincts and go along with something that makes you uncomfortable, you may end up regretting your decision. Trusting your gut can help you avoid situations you might later wish you hadn’t been in.
You decide it just isn’t working and you need to break up with the person you’ve been dating. You know it will be painful, but now that you’ve decided, you want to do it quickly and get on with your life.
What are some things you can do to make a quick break respectfully?
Choose a Private, In-Person Setting: If possible, meet in person rather than breaking up over text or social media.
Be direct but kind, and keep it brief
Use “I” Statements. To avoid sounding accusatory, focus on your feelings and needs.
What types of stages are there in dating?
meeting, curiosity, fun, sometimes commitment
If someone is sexually active, what is a healthy practice they can do with their partner that involves visiting a health center?
Getting STI tested together!
FREE at YU/Castlemont Health Center!!!