Regulation Tools
When are you supposed to use a regulation tool?
Before you flip your lid, before you go into your downstairs brain. OR if your lid is flipped and you are in your downstairs brain trying to go back to your upstairs brain.
Why is perspective taking important to solving a conflict?
Because it allows us to understand eachother and hear the other side. It helps us move past the issue and come to an agreement.
What part of the brain are you using when you crash out?
Downstairs brain
What are warning signs?
Physical signs/reactions that we are about to go into our downstairs brain, have a big emotion, etc. Specific physical sign accepted.
True or false? Perspective taking can be done quickly and without any thinking. Explain your answer.
False, because you need to use your upstairs brain (thinking brain) to perspective take. It can take a while especially if you need to calm down.
This is the part of the brain that handles problem-solving, planning, and logic.
Upstairs brain
True/False? A regulation tool is used to make a problem go away. Explain why it is true/false.
False because a regulation tool helps you calm down and think clearly. It does not make a problem go away. It just helps you with being able to move towards solving the problem.
If you are able to understand and look at another person’s perspective, BUT they don‘t want to do the same for you, what are the next steps?
Take a break from each other, give it more time, try again when both sides are calm, etc.
When you use a Regulation Tool, what are you trying to do for your brain?
Move to upstairs brain, prevent downstairs brain from taking over, calm down, slow down, etc.
Scenario: Your team lost the championship game. Name two silent or private regulation tools you can use immediately so you don't accidentally say something negative to a teammate.
taking deep breaths (or counting to 10), stepping away (or taking a walk), or stretching? (Must name two private/silent actions).
Scenario: Two friends want the same pencil. They decide to flip a coin. Why is a coin flip a poor example of a Win-Win solution/compromise?
Because only one person will get what they want. The other person won’t at all. A compromise means both sides get to have what they want.
When your downstairs brain is in charge, you are focused on reacting. When your upstairs brain is in charge, you are focused on what?
problem-solving (or logic, empathy, listening)
You are trying to ignore a distracting noise (it is annoying you) If you stop ignoring it and shout at the source of the noise, what did you fail to do?
Regulate your emotions, calm yourself, prevent from going to your downstairs brain, not remain in your upstairs brain, etc.
Scenario: After hearing your friend's side, you realize they are right and you hurt their feelings. What things must your apology include to show you fully used your empathy and perspective-taking skills?
saying sorry AND explaining why the behavior was wrong (or validating their feeling and committing to a change)
any 2 of these accepted
When it comes to these skills that were taught (empathy, emotion regulation, conflict resolution) why does it feel weird to do at first? And how can you make them a habit? what is happening in the brain when you make a habit ?
Because we are not used to it, because the brain pathway is not as clear, because we haven’t don’t it enough times, because it takes time to build a habit, etc.
To build the habit we need to consciously put in the effort to do the action even though it doesnt feel natural at first.