VALUES 101
What are values?
A. Rules adults make for you
B. Things that are important to you and help guide how you want to act
C. Things you are automatically good at
D. Goals you have to finish
Answer: B
Explanation: Values are basically the things that feel important to you. They help you think about the kind of friend, teammate, student, or person you want to be. They do not tell you exactly what to do every second, but they can help point you in the direction you want to go.
A basketball player misses the shot that could have won the game. Afterward, he practices the same shot.
What might be important to him?
A. Improving
B. Revenge
C. Popularity
D. Getting attention
Answer: A
Explanation: Missing the shot probably felt awful, but instead of only beating himself up, he uses it to figure out what he wants to get better at. That shows that improving matters to him.
Michael Jordan was known for practicing constantly and using losses and mistakes to push himself to improve.
What might that show he valued?
A. Improvement
B. Being lazy
C. Avoiding competition
D. Giving up
Answer: A — Improvement
Explanation: Practicing after mistakes can show that getting better matters. It does not mean losing feels good. It means the loss can become information about what to work on next.
What probably matters to them?
How did their reaction go AGAINST what matters?
What could they do instead?
Jack really wants to get better at basketball.
He has a terrible game and gets really disappointed. The next day he refuses to practice because he is still mad about how badly he played.
What probably matters to Jack?
A. Getting better at basketball
B. Never playing basketball again
C. Staying home
D. Avoiding his team
Answer: A — Getting better at basketball
What happened? Jack had a bad game → he felt disappointed → his brain wanted to avoid basketball → he skipped practice.
Why did his move go against what mattered? The reason Jack was SO disappointed was probably because basketball matters to him and he wants to be good at it.
But then his disappointment told him to avoid the exact thing that would help him improve.
So the feeling made sense. The urge made sense.
But following the urge took him AWAY from what mattered.
A move that fits better: Jack can still be disappointed and go to practice.
The goal is not to stop caring about the bad game. It is to not let one bad game decide his next move.
What has hands but cannot clap?
A. A clock
B. A fish
C. A chair
D. A sandwich
Answer: A clock
Explanation: A clock has hands that point to the time, but obviously those hands cannot clap.
Which one is a value?
A. Winning every game
B. Everyone liking you
C. Being a good teammate
D. Never making mistakes
Answer: C
Explanation: Winning is something you might really want, but you cannot fully control whether you win. Being a good teammate is different because that is something you can keep practicing whether your team wins or loses.
A soccer player gets benched but still cheers for the teammates who are playing.
What value might that show?
A. Teamwork
B. Being the star
C. Popularity
D. Winning every second
Answer: A
Explanation: He can be disappointed about sitting on the bench and still care about his team. Two things can be true at the same time.
Simone Biles has spoken openly about taking care of her mental and physical health, even when people expected her to keep competing.
What might that show she values?
A. Self-respect
B. Making everyone happy
C. Never saying no
D. Doing whatever other people want
Answer: A — Self-respect
Explanation: Self-respect can mean paying attention to what you need, even when other people might be disappointed. It does not mean you do not care about your team or your sport.
Mason really cares about his friendship with Tyler. At recess, Tyler chooses someone else to be his partner. Mason feels left out, so he ignores Tyler for the rest of the day.
What probably matters to Mason?
A. Friendship and feeling included
B. Being alone
C. Ignoring people
D. Making Tyler mad
Answer: A — Friendship and feeling included
What happened?
Mason cared about the friendship → he was not picked → he felt hurt and jealous → his brain said ignore him.
Why did his move go against what mattered? This is the weird part.
Mason ignored Tyler BECAUSE Tyler matters to him. If Mason truly did not care about Tyler, being picked probably would not have bothered him very much.
But ignoring Tyler does not help Mason feel closer to his friend. It might actually make them more distant. His brain was trying to protect him from feeling hurt, but the protection move could hurt the friendship even more.
A move that fits better: Mason can take some space to cool off and then go back to being Tyler’s friend or tell him he felt left out.
What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel
Why can values still help when something does not go your way?
A. They give you something you can still choose
B. They make the bad thing disappear
C. They make people treat you fairly
D. They stop you from caring
Answer: A
Explanation: You cannot always control the result, but you can still decide what kind of move you want to make next. That gives you some control even when the situation did not go how you wanted.
A player thinks the referee made a terrible call. He asks about it but does not scream at the referee.
What two things might matter to him?
A. Fairness and respect
B. Winning and popularity
C. Revenge and being right
D. Anger and yelling
Answer: A
Explanation: He can care about fairness and still choose respect. Thinking the referee is wrong does not mean he has to lose control.
LeBron James is known for passing the ball and helping teammates score instead of always trying to take every shot himself.
What might that show he values?
A. Teamwork
B. Getting all the attention
C. Never sharing
D. Being the only good player
Answer: A — Teamwork
Explanation: A great player does not always have to be the person who scores. Helping someone else succeed can also help the whole team.
Noah gets really angry when people disrespect him. Another kid makes fun of Noah, so Noah immediately makes fun of him back. What probably matters to Noah?
A. Respect
B. Being mean
C. Embarrassing people
D. Starting fights
Answer: A — Respect
What happened? Someone disrespected Noah → Noah got angry → his brain said get him back → Noah disrespected the other kid.
Why did his move go against what mattered? Noah was mad because he thought people should treat him with respect.
That makes sense. But then his anger convinced him to do the exact thing he hated having done to him.
He basically became part of the problem he was mad about.
A move that fits better: Noah can stand up for himself without doing the same thing back. He could tell the kid to stop, walk away, get help, or say something without trying to embarrass him.
Standing up for yourself and getting revenge are not always the same thing.
What has a neck but no head?
A bottle
If you get really angry when something feels unfair, what might that tell you?
A. You are bad at feelings
B. Fairness might be important to you
C. You should stop getting angry
D. You always need to win
Answer: B
Explanation: Feelings can give us clues. If unfair things really bother you, it may be because being treated fairly is important to you.
A teammate is having a terrible game. Instead of making fun of him, another player encourages him.
What might that show?
A. Kindness and teamwork
B. Weakness
C. Not caring about winning
D. Wanting to lose
Answer: A
Explanation: Being competitive does not mean you have to tear someone down. You can want to win and still treat your teammate well.
Serena Williams kept competing at a very high level for many years, even after losses, injuries, and tough matches.
What might that show she values?
A. Persistence
B. Quitting when things are hard
C. Avoiding challenges
D. Never making mistakes
Answer: A — Persistence
Explanation: Persistence means continuing to work toward something even when it is hard. It does not mean you never feel frustrated or disappointed.
Eli thinks his teacher blamed him for something he did not do.
He gets really angry and starts yelling over the teacher while she is trying to explain what happened.
What probably matters to Eli?
A. Fairness and being heard
B. Yelling
C. Getting in trouble
D. Winning an argument
Answer: A — Fairness and being heard
What happened? Eli thought something was unfair → he got angry → his brain said explain yourself RIGHT NOW → he started yelling over the teacher.
Why did his move go against what mattered?
Eli really wanted the teacher to listen to him. That is probably WHY he got so upset. But yelling over her might make it harder for her to listen to him.
So his brain was trying really hard to get him heard... in a way that could actually make it HARDER to be heard.
A move that fits better: Eli can still disagree. He can wait for the teacher to finish and then explain what he thinks happened.
Being calm does not mean the teacher is right.
It just gives Eli a better chance of actually getting his point across.
What can travel all around the world while staying in one corner?
Which one shows that two values can matter at the same time?
A. I want to win and never lose
B. I care about friendship and I also want to stand up for myself
C. I want everyone to agree with me
D. I always need to be right
Answer: B
Explanation: Sometimes two important things can pull you in different directions. You can care about keeping a friendship and still care about speaking up when something bothers you. The challenge is figuring out a way to do both.
A star athlete keeps practicing even after everyone tells him he is already great.
What might matter to him besides winning?
A. Getting better
B. Being famous
C. Looking cool
D. Never resting
Answer: A
Explanation: Sometimes people care about the feeling of improving, not just trophies or other people saying they are good.
Tom Brady lost Super Bowls during his career but kept returning to compete again.
What might that show he valued?
A. Persistence and competition
B. Avoiding hard situations
C. Never trying again after losing
D. Only playing when he knew he would win
Answer: A — Persistence and competition
Explanation: Losing something important can hurt a lot. Coming back and trying again can show that competing and continuing to improve still matter even after disappointment.
Ben cares a lot about being a good soccer player. He misses an easy shot and immediately starts thinking that he is terrible at soccer and should not even be on the team.
What probably matters to Ben?
A. Being good at soccer and improving
B. Being mean to himself
C. Quitting
D. Never making another mistake
Answer: A — Being good at soccer and improving
What happened? Soccer matters → Ben missed → he felt disappointed and embarrassed → Bully Ben showed up.
Why did his move go against what mattered?
Ben might think being really hard on himself will make him better.
But saying he is terrible does not tell him what actually went wrong. If he wants to improve, he needs useful information.
There is a BIG difference between saying I messed up that shot and saying I suck at soccer. The first one gives you something to work on.
The second one just attacks you.
A move that fits better: Ben can be annoyed about the miss and let Coach Ben take over.
That shot was bad. What happened? What can I work on? Coach Ben does not pretend the shot was good. He just actually helps.