DISCOVERING WHAT MATTERS
A value is something that guides how you want to live, not something you finish.
What is Destination or Direction
This usually comes from society, parents, school, or culture telling you what you should do.
What is Expectation
When your actions match your values, you are doing this.
What is Aligning
A “should” is often a thought that sounds like this
“I should…”, “I have to…”, “I’m supposed to…”
Everyone has the same amount of this each day.
What is time (24 hours)?
Name one example of a personal value someone might have.
kindness, honesty, growth, loyalty, creativity, family
This is an internal belief about the kind of person you want to be.
What is value
If something constantly drains you and goes against your values, you may need to do this.
Abandon or set Boundaries
Too many “shoulds” can lead to this feeling.
guilt, pressure, stress, shame
When something takes energy but gives nothing back, it may be this.
draining, unhealthy, unsustainable
Values help guide decisions especially when things feel confusing or stressful.
What is a compass
These are external requirements that have consequences if broken.
What are rules
Example: Helping a friend study even when it takes effort.
This is likely an action aligned with what value?
friendship, loyalty, kindness
Changing “I should work out” to “I want to take care of my health” shifts from pressure to this.
What is a value-based choice?
Values-based decisions require checking these two resources.
What is time and energy
This happens when someone chooses actions that match their values
What is Alignment
Example: “I want to be a supportive friend.”
This is which category?
What is Value
This question helps determine alignment
“Does this move me closer to or farther from the person I want to be?”
What question helps challenge a “should” thought?
Where did this belief come from?”
“Do I actually value this?”
If you say yes to everything, you risk this.
burnout, exhaustion, overwhelm
Why are values helpful during difficult choices?
Because they help guide decisions when emotions are strong or pressure is high.
Example: “I must get straight A’s or people will think I’m a failure.”
What is an expectation or ‘should’ belief?
Why is alignment sometimes difficult?
peer pressure, fear of judgment, habits, comfort zone
Why is dropping unnecessary “shoulds” helpful?
reduces stress
increases authenticity
helps people follow their real values
Setting limits protects your time and energy. This skill is called:
What is boundary setting?