Finish the Quote
I'm not Crying, I'm Just allergic to _____
Jerks
Time is money; Money is power; Power is pizza; Pizza is knowledge. Let’s go!
April Ludgate
Lover of peaches and vandalism; responsible for some pretty nasty trickery, even for a suburban teenager.
Greg Pikitis
Far more intelligent than his radio personality would betray… though still an undeniable sleaze bag.
The Douche
Nick Offerman is an avid ______.
Woodworker
Give me all the ____ and _____ you have
Bacon and Eggs
It’s like I always say. When life gives you lemons, you sell some of your grandma’s jewelry, and go clubbing.
His saving grace was the terrific defense of his egregious extramarital affair: “It was my birthday, and I really, really wanted to do it.”
Councilman Dexhart
Self-starting adult film actress, producer, and politician, and a friend and ally to Leslie Knope in all movements… much to Leslie’s chagrin.
BRANDI MAXXXX
Offerman is from
Illinois
I'm not crying, I'm just allergic to ______
Jerks
Pawnee's Library Department is the most diabolical, ruthless bunch of bureaucrats I've ever seen. They're like a biker gang but instead of shotguns and crystal meth they use political savvy and shhhing.
Leslie Knope
Say what you will about the man. He knows his scents.
DENNIS FEINSTEIN
The most powerful woman on Pawnee’s airwaves, and completely unfit to handle that power. Or her liquor.
JOAN CALLAMEZZO
Nick Offerman's wife
Megan Mullally
Clear alcohols are for ....
Rich Women on diets
Put some alcohol in your mouth to block with words from coming out.
Ron Swanson
He might not have a ton of integrity, but he sure knows how to get one over on white people.
Ken Hotate
Heir to the Sweetums fortune. Enjoys wii bowling.
Bobby Newport
My favorite book of his authorship is
Paddle Your Own Canoe
______ do nothing for me…but I will take a free breakfast buffet anytime, anyplace.
Strippers
These dogs are so cute I want to throw up and kill myself.
Craig Middlebrooks
Three legs. One dream.
He can do more with three legs than most dogs can do with four.
Please tell me that dog had four legs when you found him
Champion
News anchor who enjoys saying his name. Also enjoys stating exactly what is going on all the time.
Perd Hapley
Nick Offerman will be in ames on...
September 26th