Editing 1
What change needs to be made in sentence 4?
(4) Luckily for them, there is an organization called Toastmasters international that helps reluctant speakers.
A. Change there is to theirs
B. Change called to it is called
C. Change Toastmasters international to Toastmasters International
D. Change helps to help
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C. Change Toastmasters international to Toastmasters International
What is the most effective transition to add to the beginning of sentence 12?
(11) The scientists believe that the process of learning to play an instrument exercises the same region of the brain that humans use for memory. (12) When people are training to become musicians, they are also training their memory.
A. Furthermore
B. Therefore
C. However
D. To illustrate
B. Therefore
What change should be made in sentence 5?
(5) At that time a hiker named Clinton C. Clarke dreams of linking existing trails to make one long trail.
A. Change hiker to Hiker
B. Change named to he was named
C. Change dreams to dreamed
D. Insert a comma after trails
C. Change dreams to dreamed
Do you have to read the revising passages?
yes
What stategy should you use to write a short constructed response?
ACE
Select the ONE response that corrects the error in sentence 6.
(6) As everyone knows, the best way to become proficient at throwing a football or playing the piano is to practice public speaking is no different.
A. Add a comma before public
B. Add a semicolon after practice
C. Add a comma after public
D. add a colon after practice
B. Add a semicolon after practice
What revision, if any, is needed in sentence 16?
(16) The study found that professional musicians have the most gray matter, as reported in The Journal of Neuroscience.
A. The study, as reported in The Journal of Neuroscience, found that professional musicians have the most gray matter.
B. The study found that professional musicians, as reported in The Journal of Neuroscience, have the most gray matter.
C. The study was reported in The Journal of Neuroscience, it found that professional musicians have the most gray matter.
D. No change is needed.
A. The study, as reported in The Journal of Neuroscience, found that professional musicians have the most gray matter.
What change should be made in sentence 9?
(9) The project got a boost when President Lyndon B. Johnson designated the PCT as one, of two national trails in 1968.
A. Change boost to boosted
B. Change President to president
C. Delete the comma after the word one
D. Change national to National
C. Delete the comma after the word one
What is the most effective way to combine sentences 17 and 18?
(17) She climbed reluctantly into the back seat. (18) She rested her head against a pillow and promptly fell into a deep slumber.
A. After climbing reluctantly into the back seat, she rested her head against a pillow and promptly fell into a deep slumber.
B. She climbed reluctantly into the back seat, and she rested her head against a pillow, and she promptly fell into a deep slumber.
C. As she climbed reluctantly into the back seat, she rested her head against a pillow that promptly fell into a deep slumber.
D. She climbed reluctantly into the back seat, she rested her head against a pillow and promptly fell into a deep slumber.
A. After climbing reluctantly into the back seat, she rested her head against a pillow and promptly fell into a deep slumber.
What is something you should ask for if your proctor does not give it to you?
A sheet of paper
What is the correct way to rewrite sentence 7?
(7) People who belong to public speaking clubs overcome their nerves, and bad habits by standing up and giving speeches in warm, supportive environments.
A. People who belong to public speaking clubs overcome their nerves and bad habits. By standing up to give speeches in warm, supportive environments.
B. People who belong to public speaking clubs overcoming their nerves and bad habits by standing up and giving speeches in warm, supportive environments.
C. People who belong to public speaking clubs overcome their nerves and bad habits by standing up and giving speeches in warm, supportive environments.
D. People who belong to public speaking clubs overcome their nerves and bad habits by standing up and giving speeches. In warm, supportive environments.
C. People who belong to public speaking clubs overcome their nerves and bad habits by standing up and giving speeches in warm, supportive environments.
The word sad is not the most effective word to use in sentence 26. Which word should replace sad in this sentence?
(26) When learning a new instrument, some people become sad at their lack of progress and give up.
A. afflicted
B. mournful
C. discouraged
D. melancholy
C. discouraged
What change, if any, is needed in sentence 11?
(11) In recent years the number of thru-hikers on the PCT have skyrocketed.
A. Change recent to resent
B. Insert a comma after thru-hikers
C. Change have skyrocketed to has skyrocketed
D. No change is needed.
C. Change have skyrocketed to has skyrocketed
Based on the following information, decide whether you will be focused on revising or editing questions:
"Arya wrote this story about a girl who travels with her family to Big Bend National Park in West Texas. Read Arya’s story and look for revisions she needs to make. Then answer the questions that follow."
Revising
How can I mark evidence within the text to use in my ECR?
Use the highlighting tool.
What is the correct way to write sentence 9?
(8) Toastmasters was founded by Ralph Smedley. (9) Who wanted to promote leadership and communication skills in young men and thought that public speaking clubs would be a good way to do so.
A. Smedley wanted to promote leadership and communication skills in young men and thought that public speaking clubs would be a good way to do so.
B. Smedley wanted to promote leadership and communication skills in young men and thought this. That public speaking clubs would be a good way to do so.
C. Smedley wanted to promote leadership and communication skills in young men he thought that public speaking clubs would be a good way to do so.
D. Smedley wanted to promote leadership and communication skills. In young men and thought that public speaking clubs would be a good way to do so.
A. Smedley wanted to promote leadership and communication skills in young men and thought that public speaking clubs would be a good way to do so.
How should Arya revise sentence 5 to avoid repeating ideas?
(5) As the family prepared to leave for their trip one early morning, Becca’s parents’ bubbly enthusiasm contrasted sharply with her apprehensiveness while they did the necessary things to get ready.
A. As the family prepared to leave for their trip one early morning, contrasting sharply with her apprehensiveness were the necessary things they did to get ready and Becca’s parents’ bubbly enthusiasm.
B. As the family prepared to leave for their trip one early morning, Becca’s parents’ bubbly enthusiasm contrasted sharply with her apprehensiveness.
C. As the family prepared to leave for their trip one early morning, they did the necessary things to get ready that contrasted sharply with Becca’s parents’ bubbly enthusiasm and her apprehensiveness.
B. As the family prepared to leave for their trip one early morning, Becca’s parents’ bubbly enthusiasm contrasted sharply with her apprehensiveness.
What change needs to be made in sentence 4?
(4) The moon towers, which is what people now call the structures, is no longer a practical source of light.
A. Delete the comma after towers
B. Change call to called
C. Change is to are
D. Change practical to practacal
C. Change is to are
What is the most effective way to revise sentence 27?
(27) Moving through room after room slowly, paintings hung neatly on white walls.
A. Through room after room she moved slowly, paintings hung neatly on white walls.
B. She moved slowly through room after room of paintings hung neatly on white walls.
C. As she moved slowly through room after room, paintings on white walls hung neatly.
D. She moved slowly through room after room of paintings on white walls that hung neatly.
B. She moved slowly through room after room of paintings hung neatly on white walls.
What design do you draw to start planning for your ECR?
The letter "I"
What change needs to be made in sentence 2?
(2) Hikers who complete the entire trail pass through varied types of wilderness, including scrubby desert lands, forested hills, and jagged peeks.
A. Insert a comma after Hikers
B. Change who to that
C. Change pass to passes
D. Change peeks to peaks
D. Change peeks to peaks
What revision, if any, is needed in sentence 7?
(7) Becca had always loved animals, but one silly encounter with a rabbit in the backyard had made an enormous impression on her family.
A. Becca had always loved animals because one silly encounter, being with a rabbit in the backyard, had made an enormous impression on her family.
B. Becca had always loved animals and with a rabbit in the backyard, one silly encounter had made an enormous impression on her family.
C. No change is needed
C. No change is needed
What change, if any, should be made in sentence 10?
(10) In 2013 he had obtained permission to manipulate the building’s LED lights to display the video game Pong.
A. Change he to it
B. Change manipulate to mannipulate
C. Change building’s to buildings’
D No change is needed.
D No change is needed.
Arya has included a sentence in the fourth paragraph (sentences 12–15) that repeats information. Which sentence should be removed from this paragraph?
(12) “Well, hon,” Becca’s father replied optimistically, “if you enjoy lengthy stretches of highway in the midst of desert-like landscape, then yes, it’s phenomenal scenery! (13) But I promise it’ll be worth it when we get there, because the Chisos Mountains are breathtaking. (14) I give you my word it will all be worth it.” (15) Then he added, “I can’t wait for you to get a glimpse of them.”
A Sentence 12
B Sentence 13
C Sentence 14
D Sentence 15
C Sentence 14
What is the minimum number of sentences needed in an extended constructed response?