Dad Jokes
Why do dads take an extra pair of socks with them when they go golfing?
In case they get a "Hole in One"
If there are 3 oranges and you take 2, How many will you have?
2, You took 2 right?
Which animal is known as Mans best friend?
Dog
What color are the spots on a common ladybug?
black
What time is it when the clock strikes 13?
Time to get a new clock!
If April showers bring May flowers, then what do May Flowers bring?
Pilgrims
Feed me and I will live, but give me a drink and I will die. What am I?
Fire
What is the only animal that cannot jump?
Elephant
How many teeth do adult humans have?
32
What did one toilet say to the other toilet?
You are looking a bit "Flushed"
What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
a Satisfactory
I fly around all day but never go anywhere. What am I?
A flag
Through which part of the body do dogs sweat from?
paw pads
What is the main ingredient in guacamole?
avocados
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because the chicken wasn't born yet
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved
What needs an answer but does not ask a question?
telephone
Which bird has a brain smaller than its eyes?
Ostrich
Which is the largest continent?
Asia
Why did the kid in middle school bring a ladder to school?
Because he wanted to go to High School
What did one wall say to the other?
Meet me at the corner
What comes down but never goes up?
Rain
Which mammal has the most powerful bite?
Hippo
How many sides are on an octagon?
8
How do you get a squirrel to like you?
Act like a Nut