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Chuck Norris appeared in the ‘Street Fighter II’ video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked about this “glitch,” Chuck Norris replied ____ __ ______
That’s no glitch.”
When Chuck Norris lifts weights,___ _______ ___ __ _____
the weights get in shape
Ghosts
tell Chuck Norris stories at the campfire
The Flash discovered how to run at the speed of light when
he discovered Chuck Norris was looking for him.
Aliens are real.
They are just hiding from Chuck Norris.
It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. But Chuck Norris
can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box
There has never been a hurricane named Chuck because
it would have destroyed everything.
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris’ leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
the cobra died.
chuck norris daughter lost her virginity so he
got it back
Time waits for no man.
Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror, the mirror shatters.
Because not even glass is dumb enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer
Too bad he has never cried.
When Chuck Norris enters a building that is on fire
the Chuck Norris alarm rings.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number,
you pick up the wrong phone
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger,
he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
Chuck Norris plays Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver.
and wins
Chuck Norris plays Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver.
Then, Chuck Norris took over.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is courage?" He received an A+ for
turning in a blank page with only his name at the top
Voldemort
refers to Chuck Norris as ‘You Know Who’.
Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet
that can kick you in the back of the face.
When Chuck Norris does division
there are no remainders.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to wear a watch
If you want a list of Chuck Norris’ enemies,
just check the extinct species list.
leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs.
Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the hell he wants.
When Chuck Norris looked into the abyss,
the abyss looked the other way.