Social Mysteries
What is a social mystery?
A mystery about other people that is puzzling and sometimes difficult to understand.
What is attention?
What are two of the three major things that get in the way of us paying attention?
1. Thinking about other things (our mind)
2. Looking at other things (our eyes)
3. Doing other things (our bodies)
What is one prime suspect that we have discussed in this class?
Attention
What is a prime suspect in a social mystery?
The specific problem that is causing difficulty in a social situation.
Look at them with our eyes, face them with our bodies, respond nonverbally, give answers that follow what they said
What does it mean to "keep your eye on the ball"?
To focus our eyes on something in order to keep our attention on it.
What is an example of a why mystery?
Why is someone acting a certain way?
What is a social remedy?
Something that fixes the social problem.
How can you tell when someone is not paying attention on Zoom or Facetime?
Eyes not tracking and not answering questions correctly
To draw or put a dot on your hand to remind you to pay attention. Each time you
What is an example of a how mystery?
How do I go about doing something or getting something I want?
ex: how do I get someone to like me
What are the four types of social mysteries?
Why is attention important in a social situation?
Allows us to gather the facts, learn things, let people know we're interested in them, let people know that what they're saying is important
What are some tips for having a conversation with our mind?
Speak kindly, guide it back gently, ask questions
What is one way of showing that your are paying attention while on Zoom or Facetime?
Look into the camera, nonverbal responses, ask questions that are on topic
What are 3 of the 6 Keys for Gathering Facts?
1. Collect the facts and write them down
2. Have eyes and ears open for clues
3. Attention to what people say and how they say it
4. Look for clues in surrounding events
5. Look for other points of view
6. Check the facts
What is the spotlight of attention?
Imagining you have a giant powerful spotlight shining in the dark on the thing you are paying attention to.
What is the difference between the spotlight of attention and laser focus?
Using the spotlight of attention allows us to pay attention more broadly, where we can see some details in the background.
Using laser focus, we focus solely on a narrow point and don't notice as many background details.
What does it mean to look at things from other people's points of view?
Understand how two people may see the same thing in two different ways?
Ex: A playing card has two different sides