Bumpkin Schlumpkin
If you became a Vietnamese mother, you might drive your kids in this
Tran van
From the Latin for "feast," this Italian musical direction tells a performer to play in a festive, celebratory, or joyous manner
Festivo
This toy from Pop Mart with pointy ears & serrated teeth is sold in blind boxes, so you never know which one you might get
6 of us went here
UCI
It took a few months to move here, but some would say 13 years
309 Silk Tree
If you took the gym, frisbee, and cooked it in a soup
Hsu stew
Also known as a Mimosa, this ornamental tree is famous for its feathery, pink pom-pom flowers and delicate, fern-like foliage
Silk Tree
The viral moment in July 2025 where an HR executive and CEO were caught on a kiss cam happened at this concert
Coldplay incident
The triathletes went here
UC Davis
This guy was forced to bail on his place, but good thing he's not paying rent anymore
Brian
Instead of golfing, he's pitching at Fenway
Boston Austin
This two-word term describes a Quercus tree during the fall, often prized for turning shades of russet, bronze, or deep scarlet
Autumn Oak
The Instagram post for this event racked up 37 million likes and involved a (nearly?) 10 carat diamond
Taylor Swift engagement
The coldest of our lot
MIT
We can often count on this unnamed +1 to show up to volleyball
If you drink too much Terra, you're likely to make one of these which you'll come to regret
Baek mistake
Makes this sound:
Morning Dove
Robert Francis Prevost, also known as this, is probably the first of his kind to frequent deep dish pizza spots
Pope Leo
The only catholic school of our lot
USD
This person is "so pretty", but the person who said that might not remember saying it
Sarah Chen
An oversentimental pho lover
Gooey Bui
This French city is famous for its medieval bridge and for being the seat of the Popes during the 14th century
Avignon
This event led to the following cringey quote: "I feel super connected to love... you never know how much love is inside of you... until the day you launch"
Katy Perry in space/Blue Origin celebrity flight
This school was originally founded as a men's college, but the person who attended it here is not a man
Claremont McKenna College
Many bumpkins have experienced this post-grad event and 3 of us went through it this year
Layoffs