Repair
T/F: All support systems have their limits.
TRUE! All people in our support systems have limits. Having limits/boundaries allows us to protect our safety and comfort.
T/F: Having unrealistic goals and expectations help us reduce inadequacy
FALSE! Unrealistic goals/expectations can increase our feelings of inadequacy
T/F: Madison has unlimited soda hidden in the closet.
FALSE!!! There is no hidden soda closet. What comes out for snack is what was ordered and available.
When we are sober and trying to make a relationship repair, and the other person tells us no, our next step is to ______________________?
respect their boundaries, listen to their answer, leave them alone if that's what they want, etc
What is an example of an impossible standard for almost anyone?
open ended (president by 30, be first person to walk on moon, etc)
Where can I find a list of the group times/activities each day?
A) There is none.
B) Ask staff every day.
C) The calendar in the dining room.
D) The calendar in the basement.
C) The calendar in the dining room has the times and activities listed
Past/present/future: taking full accountability for your actions, no excuses or blaming
PRESENT! Take accountability for your past, in the current moment, so that your future will be better.
It is up to you to c_________ with others your reasonable needs and realistic expectations.
communicate (talk, discuss, share, etc)
The best way to earn an incentive is to set __________________ and _________ during group.
Set 1:1 goals with Madison and participate during group
You cut off a friend ten years ago because they stole your money to pay for their drinking habits. Today you received a message from them that they are sober and would like to talk. To facilitate this conversation, what are the three conflict resolution steps you would follow?
Your brother tells you "I know we used to push each other around a lot as kids, but it makes me uncomfortable now. Can we stop wrestling now that we're adults?"
Is this an example of a perceived or growing need?
Growing!
The brothers need changed with time. The wrestling was adequate as kids, but as an adult he feel like it is inadequate to his physical needs.
Where can I find a copy of the group agreements? (2 places)
dining room under tv, basement under tv
Your daughter hasn't spoken to you in 20 years due to your emotional neglect of her as a child when you were inebriated. You send her a letter apologizing for the past and taking full accountability for all that happened. She writes back and says "I'm open to a relationship with you, but how will I know I won't get hurt again?"
Using Future conflict resolution, answer her question (changes/consequences)
open ended.
changes: I'm sober now, things have changes, I got help from professionals, I want to show you emotional care, etc
consequences: If I don't maintain my word you can cut me off again, you can limit my access to you, etc
Bill has planned a July trip to Hollywood, CA. He wants to meet Angelina Jolie, sit front row at a Nirvana concert, and be able to wear his favorite goose feather coat. After his trip he comes to chat with you about his inadequate experience and says he is really disappointed. What advice would you give to Bill?
open answer. (unrealistic/impossible expectations, setting himself up for failure)
What are two examples of a 1:1 goal someone could set for themselves to earn incentives?
open ended. (hygiene, group, sober, participating, etc)