AI Explains Musicals Badly
A magical, narcissistic, and slightly terrifying woman blows into London on a strong wind to abduct two children and gaslight their parents into functioning properly.
Mary Poppins the Musical
1999. Tell me why
I want it that way by the Backstreet Boys
"the live action will have to come up with its own humor because it will simply not be able to ever replicate pascal and maximus and the weird body horror going on when she puts that man in her closet"
Tangled
Annie, are you OK? / So, Annie, are you OK? / Are you OK...
Annie
He played this historic ringmaster in 2017
P.T. Barnum
a trauma-bonded roommates-to-lovers-to-enemies story where the government uses a giant floating head to convince everyone that a green woman is a terrorist.
Wicked
1999. Clap your hands once
Mambo No. 5
"a beautiful masterpiece that i will show my children
yes i did cry to a million dreams and yes i hate jenny"
The Greatest Showman
She says I am the one, but the kid is not ...
my son
He was the Easter Bunny in this 2012 kids movie
Rise of the Guardians
A woman shoots her boyfriend because he lied about making her a star, so she goes to jail, dances about it, and then successfully convinces a reporter she is a saint to get out of jail, only to realize the reporter already moved on to the next murderess.
Chicago
2017. We got to get away
Sign of the Times by Harry Styles
"it's just a movie about a man who goes through everything he gets in life, but it successfully gave me a new perspective on how to live my life."
Forrest Gump
But, if you're thinkin' about my baby / It don't matter if you're...
black or white
He voiced a posh rat in which 2006 kids movie
Flushed Away
An orphan moves to New York and announces he is not throwing away his shot approximately 400 times before eventually throwing away his shot.
Hamilton
1966. All the lonely people
Eleanor Rigby by the Beatles
"An aspiring actress & jazz pianist are brought together by their search for love & eminence. Catchy musical numbers, striking color grading & a poignant script help create a timeless romaticization of chasing a dream in the entertainment capital of the world."
La La Land
I'm starting with the man in the mirror / I'm asking him to...
change his ways
He holds a Guinness World Record for this sharp immortal role
Wolverine
It’s 1992, and a perfectionist pop star is having a budgetary meltdown while trying to figure out how to catapult himself out of a floor. Every time someone asks a question, the main character gets hit with flashback-induced trauma where his father yells at him to dance better.
MJ the Musical
1990. Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire, Ginger Rogers, dance on air
Vogue by Madonna
"as Romancing The Pod said, what side was Genovia on in WWII??? huh?? the things they don't teach you in history class"
The Princess Diaries 2
And the whole world has to answer right now / Just to tell you once again...
Who's bad?
He was the inspiration for this significant cartoon male lead character in 2010
Flynn Rider