Definitions
A line that marks the limit of an area; also what is me or mine and what is not me or mine.
What is a Boundary?
These people say yes to the bad.
What are Compliants?
You are responsible for yourself. I am responsible for myself.
What is the Law of Responsibility?
"How can I set limits on those who need me? Isn't that being selfish?"
What is the Myth "I'm being selfish"?
The strongest weapon a controlling person uses.
What is a Guilt Message?
Our most basic need in life (aside from God).
What is a Relationship?
These people say no to the good.
What are Avoidants?
Fears of loss of love or abandonment; of other's anger; of loneliness; of guilt; of payback; of approval are examples of this law.
What is the Law of Motivation?
Many Christians fear that setting & keeping limits signals this myth.
What is the Myth of Disobedience?
Many people stay in relationships because they fear this.
What is Abandonment?
Fiction that looks like a truth.
What is a Myth?
Termed this because of their lack of attention to the responsibilities of love.
What are Non-responsives?
This law defines good as "what I do not possess" and hates the good that it has.
What is the Law of Envy?
This emotion signals that a boundary has been violated
What is Anger?
Setting boundaries and being more independent is scary because it is a step into what.
What is the Fear of the Unknown?
Also known as a chameleon.
What is a Compliant?
Narcissists fall into this category.
What are Non-Responsives?
The boundary law that mirrors cause and effect.
What is the Law of Sowing and Reaping?
The idea is that because we have received something, we owe something. The problem of this nonexistent debt.
What is the Myth of Guilt?
Releasing someone from the debt they owe us.
What is Forgiveness?
Two types of controllers.
What are Aggressives and Manipulatives?
They can't respect others' limits. They resist taking responsibility for their own lives, so they need to control others.
What are Controllers?
This law says that your boundaries need to be made visible to others & communicated to them in relationship.
What is the Law of Exposure?
I fear my limits will injure someone.
What is the Myth "I will hurt others"?
These resisters act as though your saying no is killing them, and they react with a "How could you do this to me?" message.
What are Blamers?