Boundary Basics
I feel _______________________ when ____________________and I’d like ______________________.
What is "I statements"
Telling your friend you can't take them to the grocery store because it would make you late to treatment
What is True
A communication that can feel aggressive if we're not used to it, but isn't
What is assertive communication
The best time to set a boundary
What is before it is crossed
"Kind of"... "Sort of"... "Maybe"...
What is minimizing
Prioritizing other's needs and feelings over our own
What is people-pleasing tendencies
Letting your sister borrow your phone to call a dealer when she knows you're in recovery
What is false
Setting boundaries around these is crucial to avoid environments that could threaten recovery progress.
What are triggers
A boundary that can change over time
Flexible boundary
This increases the chance that a boundary will be fully understood
What is being specific
"I statements" are a key part of it.
What is Non Violent Communication (NVC)
This is a strong boundary: "Try not to be late picking me up if it's not too much trouble. Or, you know, whatever works for you. I mean, I can get this heart surgery anytime."
What is False
This is the primary benefit of setting boundaries in all areas of life
What is improved mental health and relationships
A powerful barrier to setting boundaries
It may be impossible to set a boundary without it
What is self-awareness
Hard to set boundaries without it
What is a sense of self-worth
Unclear boundaries without consequences are harder for people to follow and can breed resentment.
What is true
This boundary involves controlling who has access to your social media and what they can see
What is privacy setting
Two common reasons boundary setting can be difficult
What are guilt and or shame
Setting boundaries without this can send mixed signals
What is consistency
Four foundations of healthy boundaries.
What is clear communication, confirmation of understanding, the use of "I statements" and consequence if broken.
All boundaries are flexible
What is false. Some boundaries, especially when it comes to your physical body, may have no room for flexibility. Your safety must come first.
Some people believe setting boundaries is this, though it’s actually a sign of self-respect
What is selfishness
Setting boundaries with your time ensures you prioritize this critical aspect of recovery
What is self-care
Three things that increase Nic's blood pressure and can ensure he goes on a 10 minute rant during group, often off topic
What are prison systems, health insurance, system failures