1,500
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
What do you call cheese that is not yours?
Nacho cheese
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef
What did the football coach say to the vending machine?
"Give me my quarter back!"
Where do fruit go on vacation?
Pear-is
What type of lion never roars?
A dandelion
What kind of room has nor a window nor a door?
A mushroom
What is yours, but your friends use it more?
Your name
What type of fish costs the most?
Goldfish
What birds are always sad?
Bluebirds
What do you call baby potatoes?
Tater Tots
What is most useful when it is broken?
Glowstick, or eggs
Why do we tell actors to "break a leg?"
Because every play has a cast
Did you hear about the catastrophic astronaut?
He just needed a little space.
Why don't scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
If you are cold, why should you go stand in the corner?
Because it is always 90 degrees.
How do you keep a bagel from getting away?
Put lox on it.
If seagulls fly over the sea, then what flies over a bay?
Bagels
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
"Between us, something smells."
What did the shark say when he ate the clown fish?
"This tastes a little funny."
A cowboy rode into town on Thursday. Three days later, he rode out of town on Thursday. How is this possible?
His horse was named Thursday.
Name a word that begins with E, ends with E, and only has one letter?
Envelope
What is a five letter word (in all caps) that reads the same, right side up and upside down?
SWIMS
What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
A nervous wreck
I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?
The letter E...Confused?
End, timE, spacE, crEation, Every placE