Grown
You know your kid is grown when you see the vacuum not used while your she's sweeping
What is "Oh wow, why aren't you vacuuming, I don't care that your sweeping, do them at the same time?"
You studied all night but your teacher moves the test to tomorrow and you studied the wrong subject
What is "Oh no, I studied all night for nothing and the wrong thing at the same time?"
They're trying to take prayer out of school
What is "They're wondering the school isn't popular?"
The head of your school says your student loan is past due
What is "I don't got it because I died, you're talking to a ghost?"
Your friend claims to be a pro cook but burns the toast, so you send it Gordon Ramsey
What is "Gordon Ramsey saw and said 'Hell's Kitchen says you're an idiot sandwich' how do you feel Megan?"
You get paid on Friday and somehow have no money by Saturday
What is "Being one of those girls and spending it all on Gucci?"
The airline wants to charge $25 to check your bag
What is, "Oh no, looks like I'm flying with a 35 pound luggage on my lap OK?"
This is the reason your cable bill is in Grandpa Joe's name
What is "I don't need that much credit, and I'm getting a vroom vroom in the broom broom?"
The teacher asks you a question but you weren't listening
What is "I don't got it, can you repeat the question Miss?"
Your neighbor Karen brings her potato salad to your cookout with a little bit of salt and no paprika
What is "Oh no Karen, keep Grandpa Bob's cooking t yourself?"
You send your smart child here because she thinks she's grown
What is "Out of my house?"
Your phone falls into a pool and you forgot to back it up
What is "Oh no, my memories are extinct and my phone has learned to swim, well done to my iPhone?"
Your best friend is trying to eat while your studying for your final
What is "Are you trying to eat quietly or start a firework show?"
Your math teacher tells you to explain your work
What is "I don't got it, I just trusted the calculator?"
Your uncle tells the same joke for the 152nd time at the dinner table at Thanksgiving
What is "Uncle John that joke is retired like you over last few weeks"
You're an adult and have to make these toys that feel like you every night
What are "Me giving up and walking into the ocean with all my clothes on, and quit your job because growing up is optional?"
The police man says there's been robberies in your neighborhood and asks if you have "any info"
What is "Oh no, officer, I don't know half my neighbors so don't ask me now shoo?"
Your trying to come up with excuse why your late to class or work
What is "I'm trying to think of an excuse that doesn't involve my dog?"
Someone gives you 20 steps to assemble a chair
What is "I don't got it, you have two options, give me three screws or let me sit on the floor?"
Your classmate answers every question but gets it wrong every time
What is "Hey Mr. I-Know-Stuff-Like-A-Psychopath let someone else have a go?"
You finally become an adult and find out this is your whole life
What is "Being tired and paying bills which have expensive hobbies?"
Your waiter has a 90 minute wait but he says there's an empty table in front of him
What is "Oh no, there's a reason it's empty?"
You're trying to win an argument over someone who thinks they're always right
What is "I'm trying to debate my wife who thinks Google is named after them?"
Everyone laughs at a joke and you missed the conversation
What is "I don't got it, but I'ma laugh and hope nobody asks why?"
Your neighbor mows his Lawn at 7 a.m. on a Sunday just to annoy everyone
What is "Nolan Connor Johnson, the grass can wait until everyone gets up?"