Impulse Control
What is an impulse
a sudden urge to do something
Define personal space
The distance that it is comfortable to have between you and another person.
What information should you never give out on the internet? Why?
Personal information, address, phone number, where you go to school or hang out. You never know who is on the other end of the conversation and what there intentions are.
What style seeks to get needs met by belittling, yelling and possibly even threatening.
Aggressive
What is step 1 of an I statement? Give an example.
I feel... name the feeling.
Example - I feel angry
Describe the steps of Stop Think and Act
Stop what you are doing, Think about the consequences of the acting on the impulse. Choose the appropriate action.
Name two situations where personal space boundaries may change
Elevators or other tight spaces, With family members, With close friends
Define what personal values are.
Give some examples
Something important to you, something you are willing to spend your, time, money and energy on.
Family, Friends, Education, Honesty, Hobbies
What are the 4 styles of communication?
Aggressive, Passive, Passive Aggressive and Assertive
What is step 2 of an I statement? Give an example.
Describe the behavior. Do not attack the person
Example - "When you walked by me at lunch and didn't say hi"
What are some impulses that have negative consequences?
Throwing things, Breaking things, Screaming at someone, Stealing something
Give an example of setting a personal space boundary with someone in an assertive manner.
Examples
"I'm sorry I don't really like to hug"
"It makes me feel uncomfortable when you stand this close to me, can you please back up?"
"I feel uncomfortable being touched can you call my name instead of tapping me on the shoulder?"
When making friends what topics are appropriate, when you first meet someone?
What topics should wait until you know someone better?
Movies, books, hobbies, videogames, music
Personal issues, family issues, health issues
What style avoids conflict often usually not getting their needs met?
Passive
What is step 3 of an I statement? give an example?
Because - describe how the behavior effected you.
Example - " when you interrupt me I feel like you don't think what I am am saying is important."
If you have trouble controlling your impulses what can you do to make better choices.
Take a break from the situation to think things through.
Don't hang out with people that tempt you to act on troublesome impulses.
Practice Stop Think Act regularly
When is it appropriate to use physical force, to maintain a physical boundary.
When you are in danger of physical harm.
When is it ok to talk about someone who is not present?
When is it not ok to talk about someone who is not present?
When talking to a parent, teacher or counselor
When talking to peers about other peers
what style seeks to get needs met by manipulating others to get what they want.
Passive Aggressive
What is step 4 of an I statement? give an example?
Describe the behavior you would like to see instead.
Example - "Please give me some space."
Define consequence.
Give and example
The result of an action.
Action Consequence
I studied hard. I got a good grade.
I didn't do my HW I got my phone taken away
When someone you don't know is approaching you in an uncomfortable way what should you do first to maintain your physical boundaries. If they continue what can you do next?
Use your voice, "Stop! Back back off!" or "Leave me alone"
If they continue exit the situation, run etc..
As a last resort use physical force and your voice to attract attention and defend yourself.
Describe a situational context friendship.
A friendship that develops surrounding a specific situation, a job, school or after school activity. These may or may not become closer friendships.
What style seeks to solve conflicts where both people feel heard, understood, and respected?
Assertive
What is wrong with this I statement?
I feel angry because you are such a jerk and didn't talk to me at lunch, can you please not ignore me?
They are attacking the person rather than simply describing the behavior