Work
What kind of car does an egg drive?
Yolksvagen.
Which day do potatoes fear the most?
Fryday.
You know what you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.
What is a ghosts favorite position in soccer?
Ghoul keeper
Why are fathers like parking spaces?
The good ones are already taken
Why did one auto company attack another auto company?
Automotive.
What’s a tree’s favorite condiment?
Branch dressing.
Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?
He was always spotted
What is a Cheerleader's favorite food?
Cheerios
What belongs to you, but others use it more than you do?
Your name
What’s Forrest Gump’s password.
1Forrest1
What did the sushi say to the bee?
Wasabi
How do you count cows?
With a cow-culator
What do you call a pig who plays basketball?
A ball hog!
How many animals did Moses take on he ark?
Moses didn't take anything on the ark, Noah did!
What do biologists wear to work on Casual Friday?
Genes.
What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic?
Sanka
What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?
Put it on my bill!
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
He wanted his quarter back!
A father has 4 daughters. Each of his daughters has a brother. How many children does he have?
The answer is 5 because each girl has the same brother.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school?
Bison.
Why shouldn't you tell an egg a joke?
Because it might crack up!
You know what's smarter than a talking bird?
A spelling Bee!
What is the hardest part about skydiving?
the ground!
Almost everyone needs it, asks for it, and gives it. But almost nobody takes it. What is it?
Advice